Dumbest things you've heard a DSMer say? :)

[AWD_Launch]

I don't know how many people though I was going to blow my motor because I was running 28lbs on pump gas well with the help of meth.

Most conversations at the track

Random guy(s): that ## car

Me: Yes

Random guys: How much boost you running?

Me: 28-30lbs depending on if I feel like pushing it. 28lbs was 11.8a/f, 30 was 12.2a/f usually had a gallon or two of race gas in the tank for added protection. 28lbs on the street though.

Random Guy: No way your pushing 28lbs, you will blow your motor. What kind of clutch do you have?

Me: Its an auto

Random Guy: You should convert to a 5spd and you will go faster

Me:WTF It was originally a 5spd and the auto set-up is way faster and breaks less. Even seen a DSM run 5, 10 second passes and not break? Let alone drive it home the exact same way I race it?

 

[acorn3583]

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i also had a honda guy with an n/ laser for a winter beater and he tells me that the 2.0 in it is garbage, so if he doesnt sell it by summer, he wants to swap to a 1.8 and turbo it cause theyre stronger... but lets admit it, weve all had our moments...
Me: wtf, man??
Mike: what?
Me: wheres your slave resivoir? did you do some weird ass delete or something?
Mike: umm, its an automatic?
Me:

or potential seller: yea, its shifting real hard, ###### gonna need a new auto trans
Steven (to us): pshh, i bet it just needs a new clutch or something simple...
us:WTFWTF

 

[Chaosweaver]

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! Wtf?

 

[DSMTyson]

"Whoa you have a tiptronic transmisson??"

I was shifting manually with my automatic...

*my blow off valve goes off*

Friend in car with me: Now all you need is some blow off valves. They'll give you like 30hp.

Me: I nicely explained that i already have an aftermarket BOV, and then explained how they work and why you need them. I then proceeded to tell him that whoever told him BOVs add power was full of shit haha.

 

[Blurred Talon]

'I just bought my DSM. How do I make 500hp?!?!?!'

 

[Chaosweaver]

'I just bought my DSM. How do I make 500hp?!?!?!'

That's a pretty common question , its not really dumb but people just have very high expectations.

 

[GsXdSmKingGsX]

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i also had a honda guy with an n/ laser for a winter beater and he tells me that the 2.0 in it is garbage, so if he doesnt sell it by summer, he wants to swap to a 1.8 and turbo it cause theyre stronger... but lets admit it, weve all had our moments...
Me: wtf, man??
Mike: what?
Me: wheres your slave resivoir? did you do some weird ass delete or something?
Mike: umm, its an automatic?
Me:

or potential seller: yea, its shifting real hard, ###### gonna need a new auto trans
Steven (to us): pshh, i bet it just needs a new clutch or something simple...
us:WTFWTF

Holy idiots, Batman!

 

[tkelly27]

A know kid thats got a evo8 from has dad and one night at the hangout, he figured that he would see what its got, so he race some stock mustang gts, and a couple civics one turboed one with a b20, so after he got beat time after time also he couldnt launch or shift, so after all the racing they ask why he lost so really didnt stay anything then after like 10mins, he did the old pop the hood check the engine like he knew what he was doing, so after that he says i forgot to turn the intercooler on, he never showen up again.

Lmao. If you've got an intercooler that needs to be turned on (a/w) you don't forget to turn it on.

 

[daplatano91]

I was talking to my friends just yesterday about the new 2g he bought and he told me some interesting new things he learned.
Me: ooo nice you finally got the 2g you were talking about
Him: yeah the guy finally agreed to let it go for 4k
Me: wow thats pretty steep for a car with 140k and in such bad condition
Him: don't hate bro he left all the mods he did to it on the car for me thats why its so much
Me: o0o ok what did he do to it?
Him: yeah you know he got a new 91 n/t throttle body k&n intake some blue spark plug wires and this prototype fuel filter that mixes the gas with alcohol and nos and triples my cars hp.
Me:
wow did the guy who sold it to you tell you that?
Him: yepp great deal huh?
Me: yeah sure awesome What do you tune it with?
Him: o0o the guy told me that since the car was converted to 5 spd he was able to put a flashable chip in the auto trans ecu.
Me:WTF Nice glad you happy with it

I just walked away like some people are so gullible

 

[PIMking]

So does that mean I can go as fast as a ferrari now?!?

sure, if said Ferrari is doing 30 MPH and the DSM is doing 40 than it's faster

 

[acorn3583]

ok, just so you all know, im still learning (you can never know everything) but when i first started trying to rebuild my gsx, one of my dsm friends was being a total a-hole and actually sold me this gem for $150 and the title to my n/a 89 talon...

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and please do not correct me and tell me that talons didnt come out till 90, i know that... this one was built in 89 and sold as a 90... same way my gsx was built in 91, has a 6 bolt and the 2gb style... these things happen, PLEASE dont flame me for my years, i know what im talking about... this time...

 

[tkelly27]

ok, just so you all know, im still learning (you can never know everything) but when i first started trying to rebuild my gsx, one of my dsm friends was being a total a-hole and actually sold me this gem for $150 and the title to my n/a 89 talon...

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and please do not correct me and tell me that talons didnt come out till 90, i know that... this one was built in 89 and sold as a 90... same way my gsx was built in 91, has a 6 bolt and the 2gb style... these things happen, PLEASE dont flame me for my years, i know what im talking about... this time...

That is so cool. It is even properly made with 1&4 and 2&3 paired. Are you going to run it?

 

[dexterholland04]

Woah, that setup is bonkers. And overkill. I love it.

 

[acorn3583]

^^ haha, thanks... not bad for a $275 paperweight, huh? also has been used for a door prop, tire chock, and my personal favorite, toe stubber...

That is so cool. It is even properly made with 1&4 and 2&3 paired. Are you going to run it?

no, i dont think so... if you want it, let me know i will gladly ship this monstrosity... all in all im proud to say i have the potential for an actual twin turbo dsm, and it has got me thinking of possibly looking into a small tt setup in the future, but... long time out... i just want a running dsm for once in my life... i think ive owned 8 dsms in the last year and have only driven one

 

[crash89]

Just came home for a week of leave and met up with matt (mrpeepers) and another buddy of mine who doesnt know much about cars but he kinda talks like he does, hes got an 01 v6 mustang... Anyways I went with my buddy to meet up with Matt for a lil bit and a convo went like this:

Me to Matt: Hey, I tell you Im gonna all wheel swap the sypder this fall?
Buddy: I want to make my mustang 4 wheel drive!
Me: chuckle to myself
Matt: No!
Buddy: Itd only cost about 3 grand..
Matt: Are you drunk!?!?
Buddy: Nahh.. Well yeah! I just got back from work and had a couple.. I was bored.
Im just dying at this point..

Another one in the same convo from the guy, dont remember the whole thing but we were talking about Kennys (kp116) car and I mentioned he made 640awhp @ 35 psi and he was like "whoah! He should be careful he could mess up his engine with that much pressure! Hes got to have some kind of timing or something!!"

Got me and Matt a good laugh for that day!

 

[400hp93talon]

This kid I sold a 2g to is all excited that he has it and wants to start putting boltons right away......I was talking to him and hes giving me all these ideas on what he wants to do.....Im gonna do this,this and all these other things.....I try to help him realize that his 7 bolt has 140000 miles and he probably needs to worry about other things than getting all this other shit....... I stop and tell him you do know that just by bolting on a 20g turbo and cranking up the boost you dont get 400hp right................really long pause in the conversation....................Then I had to teach him the fundamentals of how it works .......Not the funniest thing ever but I got a chuckle out of it.

 

[ilco187]

i was at auto zone a few weeks ago and i went in for parts on a 1.8 talon i was working on and the guy asked if i knew anyone who wanted a gst 2g for $1.200 i was like me, i started asking questions and he told me that the previous owners took the turbo off so i was like no biggy, well when i got to the place it was at it was a bone stock POS 420a and i told him this car was never turbo. he was a super car noob i dont even know how he worked at auto zone when he didnt even know really anything.

 

[rlacasse1]

That is so cool. It is even properly made with 1&4 and 2&3 paired. Are you going to run it?

Unless this is sarcasm I vote this as the stupidest thing anyone has ever heard a DSMer say.

 

[awd4u]

" is the hump on your hood for your turbo?"

me- ( shut the #### up)

 

[agarc023]

" is the hump on your hood for your turbo?"

me- ( shut the #### up)

I had a similar one except it was "how did you dent your hood like that"

 

[daplatano91]

We were talking about places to get e85 in New York City so someone said there is a place near JFK airport. So the kid comes out and says there is only like 2-3 gas stations in the city and JFK is in queens.

I don't know if he knows the difference between NY state and the city (five boroughs) but I was just amazed.

 

[acorn3583]

i was talking about my 92 gsx at a party one day and how im going through a total rebuild cause the car sat for so long blown up... this guy (who is a stealership mechanic, by the way) begins to tell me how hes building a celica gt for racing... catches my attention right away... he tells me about his brakes, exhaust, intake, and all this stuff, but then he drops the ball on me... he told me that his celica used to be awd turbo like my gsx, he just converted it to rwd n/a so he could use it as a daily driver... hutawhat? i said, "im pretty sure they never made awd celicas... and the gt was never turbo..." to which he replies "oh, yea... it was a gtx... i just switched the badges so people wouldnt know!"

 

[rlacasse1]

There were AWD Celicas.

It was the GT-Four.

 

[3kgt2nv]

Toyota Celica GT-Four - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[acorn3583]

i was wrong... thank you for correcting me! but it still didnt happen, he didnt do it, hes full of it... thanks again for the lesson