Dumbest things you've heard a DSMer say? :)

[dsm-onster]

Well I used to sit in the driverseat of my first car and make engine noises when no one was looking. I hear Peeps still does it . . . . At least he's running his motor. Kids will be kids.

 

[motox-010]

This from a *heated* discussion about some guy's Integra. Which has turned into me versus about 3 retarded ricers tryin to tell me about DSMs
"um just to let u know a talon isnt a dsm its made by chrysler thats an american brand....its made to imitate a dsm just like a pontiac solstice to a saturn sky "
As well as there is Trans Ams come with A WS6. There isn't such a thing as a WS6 package.
The "mod" list of the Integra
B18C bored
stage 3 cams
GReddy timing gears
GReddy ball bearing Turbo and intercooler (sequential)
JDM Computer
DC Sports turbo headers
Greddy turbo exhaust
And it's got dual port injection nitrous
Not to mention all the aftermarket suspension. It'll out handle a lotus.

Here's the link if anyone wants a good laugh. Fan photos from Nice truck. Sorry about your dick. | Facebook

 

[2GFWDbeast]

So i know this girl who owns a gs-t and she thinks she knows everything so i thought i would play a joke on her and ask her if she could find me a rear axle for my gs-t and a made up bypass valve for my intercooler. Her respones was ya i can try and find you them have you ever been on chitowndsm i was ya but the stuff is to much money and she like ooooh ok well ill do my best and find the stuff for you wow

 

[One Equals Two]

^^^ You cruel person you. Hope you didn't ask for the driveshaft too.

At least he has a real BOV working and actually does something.

Thats alot better than the electronic bov sound.
This is from a real ricer "It would be cool to hook a couple up and space them out so it would last longer." PPSSSSSHHHHHHHHHPPPPPSSSSHHHHHHH!!!! I was thinking yeah why not just hook up an electronic whoopie cushion with a megaphone on it PPPLLLLPPPPTTTTTBBBBLOP BLOP wouldn't that be awesome!

I'd love to see a Whoopie Valve or a Fart off Valve or something like it.

 

[Gasolinebaptism]

So i know this girl who owns a gs-t and she thinks she knows everything so i thought i would play a joke on her and ask her if she could find me a rear axle for my gs-t and a made up bypass valve for my intercooler. Her respones was ya i can try and find you them have you ever been on chitowndsm i was ya but the stuff is to much money and she like ooooh ok well ill do my best and find the stuff for you wow

Well buddy, sure an intercooler bypass valve sounds stupid, but it also sounds like a very specific part, and you might not have come across correctly to her. Plus, a GS-T, has a rear axle buddy. There is no drive line attached, and no diff. but that doesn't mean it's not an axle.
So, what we are left with is you being a dick to a fellow DSMer, and what's worse, is that the fellow DSMer is a chick, a very rare sight in the automotive world, and that may be partially due to dudes like you.

(Maybe that's the setup anywho... )

 

[2slow4now]

You could get one of those "warning" stickers to go over the air bag warning and see if she will comply so you don't get a ticket for not removing her restrictive clothing! Maybe she could be your new girl friend. Like GB said there isn't too many dsmer gals. At leasst she drives a dsm something in common.

 

[One Equals Two]

Well buddy, sure an intercooler bypass valve sounds stupid, but it also sounds like a very specific part, and you might not have come across correctly to her. Plus, a GS-T, has a rear axle buddy. There is no drive line attached, and no diff. but that doesn't mean it's not an axle.
So, what we are left with is you being a dick to a fellow DSMer, and what's worse, is that the fellow DSMer is a chick, a very rare sight in the automotive world, and that may be partially due to dudes like you.

Oops, I thought they were independent suspension in the rear, just control arms and hubs...

 

[2slow4now]

^^^ You cruel person you. Hope you didn't ask for the driveshaft too.



I'd love to see a Whoopie Valve or a Fart off Valve or something like it.

Hey maybe I could market this great idea I had! Do I have any takers on an electronic fart off valve to cover up that terrible ppppssssssshhhhh sound our cars do???

 

[One Equals Two]

Hey maybe I could market this great idea I had! Do I have any takers on an electronic fart off valve to cover up that terrible ppppssssssshhhhh sound our cars do???

I'd only get it for a Honda, and then turbo the s*** out of it to make it actually fast to own any predator DSMs...

 

[Boost92gsx]

i pull up to the meeting spot while every one is leaving for a minute to get food. I see this guy standing next to an 08 subaru wrx. And this guy looks pissed. so im like wats up man is there something wrong with your car or somethng and he says(note these wer all my realy good friends leaving when i pulld up) i took the kid with the sti for a ride (cobb tunning sti 400 to the wheels) and he said the tiiissss sound when i go to shift means my muffler bearings are about gone and that id have to let it cool off and feather it back to the subaru dealership, and the kid with the honda said my warranty is probably void because i wasnt checking my brake light and headlght fluid and subaru can test that knd of stuff because they have electronic testers and when they find out i was running my lights with no fluid im going to have to pay for it out of my pocket..... kid was really upset and i was at loss of words

 

[Gasolinebaptism]

I wish someone bought be an '08 WRX, even though they knew I wouldn't keep the blinker fluid full...

 

[Boost92gsx]

. yah i still see this guy drivng around every once in while with no exhuast and i mean none

 

[Gasolinebaptism]

Here's your sign.

 

[2slow4now]

I'd only get it for a Honda, and then turbo the s*** out of it to make it actually fast to own any predator DSMs...

Yeah it would be like a sleeper. Everybody would hear you farting around the block and think your cars just a turd cause it sounds like it! Then you let the chit fly!! It would be like a shart you think its one thing and surprise your pants are full!

 

[mainerdsm]

Some of these stories are starting to sound a little fake to me. Don't be making up stuff now! Ha Ha .

 

[Fotowntalon]

about a year or two back i was at a poker tournament. At the break the guy had to run and get more money, when he came back in the place he was all hooting and hollering "eclipse spyder, 10s in the quarter!"

So he sits next to me and i go "wow a spyder, those are nice looking cars"
him: Yeah, i like it
me: So you must have some serious money into that thing to make it run 10's
him: yeah man, i got this mean sound system in it, things nice
me : well ready to play some cards?

 

[Gasolinebaptism]

^that's sad to see.
I saw the most riced out eclipse the other day while golfing, lie green with black graphics, a huge wing, body kit, and the ugliest,shiniest 19 inch rims I have EVER seen.

 

[red21t]

this girl i know owns a 03 eclipse gt......she was told it was supercharged and rear wheel drive. She tried convincing me the same.....so the car maybe slightly having a SC , i wanted to know.......no sc. And well the rear wheel drive thing is self explanitory.

 

[pj91gsx]

My friend Rontae, just bought a honda civic hatch completely stock, he said i want to put a Blow off valve on it. We are saying Rontae i think you have to have a turbo for that blow off valve to work.

 

[lude000]

My cousin tried telling that his talon was a jdm race car
Oh and this
http://www.dsmtuners.com/forums/hangout/337575-all-wheel-drive-n-t.html

 

[EAG13GSX]

Last June (2009) I use to work at Autozone. Ive also worked at Pep Boys for a year prior to that and now i currently work at a Mitsu Dealership. So im safe to say ive heard my share of stories about cars from customers and I also know a good one when i hear it. So i go into Autozone last week and theres this kid Javier working there who basically took my position after i left. I've only talked to him a few times and today was no different. I went in to buy some snap ring pliers to install my HKS SSQV II BOV onto my intercooler pipe. He walks up to me and asks me whats up and if i need any help. I say no and he then asks me what im buying the pliers for. I explain its for my BOV and he says "Oh shit bro, your car is turbocharged?". Im like yep and then he asks what car I have and I tell him a few things im running, trying not to sound too cool or anything. He says his buddy picked a 96 GSX like mine and how its completely modded and heres how its goes:

Me: oh really? whats he running in it?
Him: Bro this thing is soo fast. its the twin turbo version and hes got....... oh shit my bad sorry i mean THREE turbos because the the third one is running off the exhaust you know? hes got hella shit in it i cant even remember everything.
Me: (Knowing this kid is as dumb as a smart rock ) Holy shit bro thats fast.... How much Psi per turbo?
Him: Idk man probably too much. At least 20psi
Me: So like 60psi all together?
Him: ya bro its crazy
Me: and its a 96 right? so hes running on the stock 6 bolt? (now im messing with him)
Him: Ya bro 6 bolts.
Me: And its an all stock motor? i mean those internals are pretty good
Him: Ya his car is nuts
Me: How much horsepower you think it has? just give me a number
Him: At least over 700 horses WTF
Me: Shit must be wicked then. Well i gotta go back to workin on my slow ass DSM. Later.
Him: Wait i thought you said u had an Eclipse?


Wow......

 

[domothegreat18]

the dumbest thing i ever head ALL TALONS AND ECLIPSE HAVE AN BUMP IN THE HOOD BECAUSE THERE TURBO

 

[chaggard27]

So I am trying to sell my car and went to meet up with a guy and his "dsm knowledgable" "mechanic friend" so that they could check out the car. As soon as I heard him say his friend "knew" about dsm's i was worried....Anyways I get there and the friend is in a mazda because his dsm isnt running due to a smashed tranny he says...first clue...then he asks if he can drive my car. Of course I decline and tell him I will drive and he can sit in the passenger seat. Once in the car he tells me his car has a 16g and is pushing 390 hp....second clue... and that he has NEVER been in a dsm that is faster than his.....third clue....So I go along with it and ask what size injectors he is using and what he is using to tune it to get that much hp out of a 16g. His reply.....255 injectors and no tune because he has an open atm. bov.....fourth, fifth, six, seven, etc clue....I just stopped the car and said that I had to leave to go pick up a friend ...I had a good laugh after that one thats for sure.

 

[400hp93talon]

A little while back I cruised to a neighboring town just to hang with some friends well while we where sitting at the local spot this kid with a white 3000gt sl pulled up. You know when you can tell someone is a dumbass just by looking at them.....well this was one of those situations. So hes strollin over to the side of my car and starts talking to my pals about how hes putting twin 17 gauge turbos from a vr4 3000gt and how its going to run 10's?????????????????? Then he started to ask questions about my car......"Is it turbo?" he asks........."Well yeah thats why it says 16v dohc turbo on the side of my car it's a tsi" I replied........"Well what size turbo does it have?"........"Just a 20g with some bolt ons"........."PPPSSSSHHHHH I'd like to see that!!!" then he goes back to his car the guys told him to get on it when he leaves and he said "I'm tired and I can't shift.....oh and I got a long drive home!(which was a mile away)!" and then he left and never heard of him since.

 

[cabbageman97]

the dumbest thing i ever head ALL TALONS AND ECLIPSE HAVE AN BUMP IN THE HOOD BECAUSE THERE TURBO

My father is always getting on my ass because there is always something I'm fixing on my car. He tells me one day...

Him - Now what was the engineering thought process behind beating on the underside of your hood a million times in just one spot just so it could close all the way because they decided to put a motor in it that was inherently too big but couldn't turn around and change all of the engines out of the cars already built. It must have made too much sense to put a hood on it that actually fit and was even. I don't know what it is about those Japanese car makers.

Me - Actually it's domestic.

Him - I still think the hump looks stupid.