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Dumbest things you've heard a DSMer say? :)

Posted by Tobuk, Oct 10, 2006

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  1. DSMBanditFZ6

    DSMBanditFZ6 Proven Member

    2,088
    1
    Joined Nov 17, 2011
    Somewhere, Arkansas
    Ahhhhhhh!!! They say there the same, but there not the same!:cry::cry::cry::rolleyes:WTFWTFWTF:mad::notgood:


    Sorry. Hurts my eyes.:p
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 10, 2014
  2. agarc023

    agarc023 Supporting VIP

    1,651
    8
    Joined May 14, 2009
    Vista, California
    Just remembered this bit of conversation that my buddies had when we were young and dumb back in high school...

    We were admiring a friend's new sentra se-r that he had just put a cold air intake on.

    One friend asked the other "so when does it kick in?"

    If that wasn't bad enough I remember being genuinely interested in the answer :|
     
  3. clizz3

    clizz3 Proven Member

    218
    0
    Joined Sep 25, 2011
    franklin, Indiana
    Hell no LOL he had the same motor as my lancer. A stock 4g94.
     

    2K  0

    1991 Mitsubishi Eclipse GST
    10.520 @ 125.450 · 1G DSM
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  4. 2gprpletsi

    2gprpletsi Probationary Member

    30
    0
    Joined Mar 5, 2012
    byroncenter, Michigan
    guy at work "What does DSM stand for?"
    not to bad...except i work for chrysler :ohdamn: LOLz
     

    251  0

    1995 Eagle Talon TSi AWD
    · 2G DSM
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  5. NHerron

    NHerron Proven Member

    2,780
    54
    Joined Nov 5, 2011
    Missoula, Montana
    Does Size Matter?
    Demands Support & Maintenance
    Dynamic & Superseding Machine

    Don't tell him the real one he must never know!
     

    2K  0

    1997 Mitsubishi Eclipse GSX
    11.230 @ 127.000 · 2G DSM
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  6. 91stocker

    91stocker Proven Member

    3,623
    78
    Joined Jan 15, 2010
    Vassar, Michigan
    I was recently told a story about a local guy who "built" his bottom end himself. He cranked the main bolts down by hand with a standard ratchet. The crank wouldn't spin so he backed them off "a bit" till it spun. Then ran the motor like that. And "spun" it did. He then went on a rant on how these motors are junk and he'll never "build" one agin LOL. This coming from a guy who had no idea what torque spec or tolerances meant, yet alone how to measure them.

    The amazing thing i guess is that the motor actually ran for 100 miles rofl. I guess that was his third attempt at building a dsm bottom end ROFL
     

    2K  0

    1991 Eagle Talon TSi AWD
    13.26 @ 102.09 · 1G DSM
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  7. pointblank9957

    pointblank9957 Proven Member

    283
    3
    Joined Jul 12, 2012
    Kingsford, Michigan
    if your talkin about the 4g eclipse, then yes, it is such a piece of junk.
     

    Street Build 1K  0

    1995 Eagle Talon TSi AWD
    manual · 2G DSM

    Street Build 3K  3

    1998 Mitsubishi Eclipse Spyder GST
    361 whp · 364 lb/ft · 2G DSM

    Street Build 1K  2

    1996 Mitsubishi Eclipse Spyder GST
    fwd · manual · 2G DSM
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  8. Bud92gsx

    Bud92gsx Proven Member

    22,596
    168
    Joined Jan 16, 2008
    Wisconsin, Wisconsin
    Not a dsmer, but I was at a gas station today..This old guy almost put deisel in his caddy..Then he filled some red gas cans in his trunk with deisel.

    Even my girl was like WTF is this guy doing..OMG hes going to put deisel in his caddy.
     

    6K  20  14

    1992 Mitsubishi Eclipse GSX
    13.300 @ 102.400 · 1G DSM
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  9. MJcanada

    MJcanada Proven Member

    3,126
    55
    Joined Jun 25, 2011
    Inman, South Carolina
    LOL my friend was telling me the other day how he was going to have the guy working on his car bore it out to a 2.3.

    He told me the guy said he could do it but there would still be a small hole left that oil, would pass by. I have no clue wth either, were thinking.

    I explained to him how that was impossible to do. Then I told him how he shouldn't have the guy do anything other than assemble his engine. He goes on to tell me how,well certified this dude is.

    I just said it was his engine but if it were mine I wouldn't let that guy touch it.
     

    1K  0

    1995 Mitsubishi Eclipse GST
    manual · 2G DSM
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  10. g4ebguy90

    g4ebguy90 Proven Member

    2,001
    2
    Joined Mar 9, 2011
    Rockford, Illinois
    Seeing how I buy lots of parts from people all over the place. I have scene it all.

    My favorite was:

    Me and my girl drove to wisconsin to trade some stereo stuff for a whole engine.
    I'm sitting there waiting for this guy to show up.

    All of a sudden guy flys in VROOOMMMMMM KRSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH from the gravel flying everywhere. Slams on the brakes. Just stares at me for like 10 seconds. Then just pegs the Rev Limiter for like id say another 10 seconds. Then just shuts the car off.

    I just looked at my girlfriend and had a smirk. Got out, and this guy starts all ready about how his car
    is pushing 500+ hp, hes got bla bla bla bla bla.

    Pops the hood. THE FRICKEN ENGINE IS SITTING ABOUT 6 INCHES BELOW WHERE ITS SUPPOSED TO SIDEWAYS.
    He starts freaking out O MAN MY MOUNT BROKE. He made some crappy custom mount that I guess fell apart on the way over to meet me. Like the cam cover was hitting the frame of the car. I just started laughing.

    That was awesome... O btw that car was pretty much stock besides some crappy ebay turbo manifold. He had a 14b on it.
     
  11. NHerron

    NHerron Proven Member

    2,780
    54
    Joined Nov 5, 2011
    Missoula, Montana
    Sounds like something from a Will Ferrel or the Dodgeball movie ROFL
     

    2K  0

    1997 Mitsubishi Eclipse GSX
    11.230 @ 127.000 · 2G DSM
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  12. TurboLaserRS

    TurboLaserRS Proven Member

    512
    6
    Joined May 14, 2011
    Dayton, Ohio
    My neighbors daughter wanted to have a bonfire. My yard is a lot bigger and open than theirs so we said that's cool they can do it here. They're in highschool i think.
    Anyways I pull into the driveway in my laser and notice a Talon sitting there. So I walk down to the fire and ask who's it is. I talk to him for a bit, he's probably 16. I ask him if its turbo awd and he says 'yeah its the ESI model, its pretty fast." Cool dude.. LOL. So then just for fun I ask him hey you want to run? What's faster 1g or 2g? He says "I don't race anymore, I blew up my head gasket and had to pay 700 dollars to replace it." I couldn't keep a straight face anymore so I said ' dang that sucks' and I walked in my house.

    Reminds me of when I first got my Laser running, I took it to show my brother and my dad because they told me id never be able to do it. I pop the hood and my brother points to the stock air can and asks "is that the turbo?" Lmao.
     

    2K  0

    1990 Plymouth Laser RS Turbo
    11.128 @ 132.500 · 1G DSM
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  13. curt-s

    curt-s Proven Member

    1,484
    262
    Joined Dec 21, 2008
    Winterville, MB, Canada
    If it is indeed true that the mechanic said that, I would even let him assemble my engine.

    What hole?
     

    Street Build 2K  1

    1991 Eagle Talon TSi
    fwd · manual · 1G DSM
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  14. brandonwh64

    brandonwh64 Proven Member

    758
    3
    Joined Mar 9, 2011
    Chatsworth, Georgia
    Last edited: Sep 26, 2012
  15. ramsack

    ramsack Proven Member

    3,286
    16
    Joined Dec 27, 2007
    West Lawn, Pennsylvania
    I don't get how people say they don't have time to do anything.
     
  16. ramsack

    ramsack Proven Member

    3,286
    16
    Joined Dec 27, 2007
    West Lawn, Pennsylvania
    Yep.
     
  17. greydelta38

    greydelta38 Proven Member

    139
    0
    Joined Sep 25, 2012
    Huntsville, Alabama
    Him: "How many turbo's are on your car?"
    Me: "Uh... just one." (trying not to laugh)
    Him: "Oh, sweet. I have four superchargers on my Mustang"

    I had to sit down to keep from falling over laughing.
     
  18. Dert

    Dert Proven Member

    919
    9
    Joined Mar 8, 2008
    Lethbridge, AB, Canada
    I really hope this was a joke video LOL "absolutely nothing wrong with this car" he says immediately after pointing to the removed recirc tube that was removed so the MAF will read the air properly ROFL not to mention the fact that the small looking 3" exhaust magically fit in the stock location...wish mine woulda fit up there...
     

    793  0

    1997 Mitsubishi Eclipse GST
    · 2G DSM
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  19. g4ebguy90

    g4ebguy90 Proven Member

    2,001
    2
    Joined Mar 9, 2011
    Rockford, Illinois
  20. Extremities

    Extremities Proven Member

    146
    0
    Joined Aug 6, 2012
    Wesley Chapel, Florida
    I'm young and slowly learning how everything in a car works. My first and current car is a 98 Spyder Gs. It's nice to know all the things NOT to say LOL.
     
  21. isantop

    isantop Proven Member

    526
    0
    Joined Jun 23, 2011
    Denver, Colorado
    It's pretty simply really. If you aren't sure, don't say it like you are. :thumb:

    Seriously, you don't need to know a ton about car to avoid sounding like some of these guys. Just don't talk above your head, and you'll look sensible, intelligent, and eager!
     
  22. DSMBanditFZ6

    DSMBanditFZ6 Proven Member

    2,088
    1
    Joined Nov 17, 2011
    Somewhere, Arkansas
    I stop to talk to a guy the other day driving a red 96 n/t.

    Me: nice n/t right?
    Him: yeah it's fast
    Me: a fast 420a chrysler motor?
    Him: staring at me like im crazy) how do you know its a chrysler motor?
    Me:pop the hood

    So he pops it, lo and behold its a 420a. So I commence to telling him about turbo cars and how they are mistubishi motors etc etc....
    And how I just built a 90 gsx.

    Him: Uh, I used to have a 92AWD but it had a talon motor in it and that's a chrysler motor!

    Me: "facepalm" ok, your right, have a nice day.......
     
  23. ilco187

    ilco187 Proven Member

    1,713
    6
    Joined Jan 3, 2009
    Niles, Michigan
    Some random idiot tried to tell me rare 1g's had 10 bolt motors. i said where in the [BLEEP] did you get that? he say well theres 6 in front and 4 in the rear :ohdamn: i said uh no its stands for 6 bolt engine 4 bolt rear axles.
     

    1K  0

    1993 Mitsubishi Eclipse N/T
    · 1G DSM
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  24. GettinPaper

    GettinPaper Proven Member

    289
    0
    Joined Aug 31, 2009
    Battle Ground, Washington
    LOLoLOL @ the guy selling his GST, "it pulls hard, i've raced it but only three nights" LOL
     

    263  0

    1991 Eagle Talon TSi AWD
    manual · 1G DSM
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  25. NHerron

    NHerron Proven Member

    2,780
    54
    Joined Nov 5, 2011
    Missoula, Montana
    The guys at work bag on my car all the time because everyone around here is either a Ford or Chevy truck person. I'm pretty much the only car guy around. I won't lie, it gets on my nerves how people just love to knock something they have no idea about.

    Anyway my co-worker hits me with one of these:
    A Subaru WRX would slam you. Their turbos hit instantly.

    Another:
    A stock Spyder would beat your GSX.

    Annnd another:
    I asked him what he thought of a AWD Talon and he said they were cool. But he bags on my Eclipse GSX.


    You guys can't even imagine how awesome it will be the day when I dyno this small setup and how surprised he'll be. Might even get him interested in real tuning vs old school, hopefully.
     

    2K  0

    1997 Mitsubishi Eclipse GSX
    11.230 @ 127.000 · 2G DSM
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