Slow old poop
15+ Year Contributor
- 707
- 7
- Jul 24, 2005
-
Cedar Rapids,
Iowa
This old joke needs to be changed:
What are the three most dangerous things in the world?
1. A mugger with a straight razor
2. A Jewish commando with an Uzi
3. A doctor in a new Bonanza*
Amend that last line to read: A ricer in an Evo
AMS threw a track day at Autobahn North Course (Joliet, IL) for its customers, and the Evos were dying like flies. One smacked a tire wall at speed and took out its entire side. Another blew its engine coming down the front straight in spectacular fashion. Others came in on "the hook" left and right.
The carnage was so bad that we had a second driver's meeting, where we were warned to slow it down, it's not racing, there's no timing and, because it was a Monday, all the corner workers and tow truck drivers had been recruited at the local bars, so getting cars towed in would take hours, not minutes (I made up the last one, but that's how it seemed).
First session: 4 laps, redflagged because of two incidents on the same lap that blocked the track.
Second session: Left the fans running, ran down the battery, had to push start the Eclipse, started the session 10 minutes late, got 4 more laps.
Third session: Really cooking now, running down M3s, Evos and Porsches, but got blackflagged for an oil leak. (Good thing, too, or the Eclipse might have gone up in flames)
So, not a lot of track time, but neither did anyone else. At least I learned a new track. Mostly, people stood around, waiting for the Three Stooges Track Crew to tow in broken Evos.
Only three DSMs showed up: The Blue Meanie, a green one and a silver one. All the rest of the Mitsu contingent were Evos. There were about 50 cars at the event. The biggest marque was Evos, but the usual suspects also showed up: M3s, Porsches, Vettes, etc.
Some lessons for future organizers of track days:
1. DO NOT allow pure novices on a race track without an experienced driver or instructor riding along. Nobody was hurt at Autobahn this day, but they could have been. It is especially bad when the ricer rookies are running Evos that have been modded. Imagine taking an 11-sec drag car down a 1,200 ft straight, then braking and turning in -- without any track experience! On street tires and street brakes! It's a recipe for disaster of biblical proportions.
2. If you run on a weekday, MAKE SURE the track gives you an experienced track crew. Otherwise, you may lose hours of track time while Mo and Curly figure out how to hook up all those Evo tow cables.
Rich
*From the days when they still made twin-engine Bonanzas. Rich doctors would buy one, then "augur in" as Tom Wolfe put it, because twin-engine airplanes are not that easy to fly. The same analogy applies here with Evos.
What are the three most dangerous things in the world?
1. A mugger with a straight razor
2. A Jewish commando with an Uzi
3. A doctor in a new Bonanza*
Amend that last line to read: A ricer in an Evo
AMS threw a track day at Autobahn North Course (Joliet, IL) for its customers, and the Evos were dying like flies. One smacked a tire wall at speed and took out its entire side. Another blew its engine coming down the front straight in spectacular fashion. Others came in on "the hook" left and right.
The carnage was so bad that we had a second driver's meeting, where we were warned to slow it down, it's not racing, there's no timing and, because it was a Monday, all the corner workers and tow truck drivers had been recruited at the local bars, so getting cars towed in would take hours, not minutes (I made up the last one, but that's how it seemed).
First session: 4 laps, redflagged because of two incidents on the same lap that blocked the track.
Second session: Left the fans running, ran down the battery, had to push start the Eclipse, started the session 10 minutes late, got 4 more laps.
Third session: Really cooking now, running down M3s, Evos and Porsches, but got blackflagged for an oil leak. (Good thing, too, or the Eclipse might have gone up in flames)
So, not a lot of track time, but neither did anyone else. At least I learned a new track. Mostly, people stood around, waiting for the Three Stooges Track Crew to tow in broken Evos.
Only three DSMs showed up: The Blue Meanie, a green one and a silver one. All the rest of the Mitsu contingent were Evos. There were about 50 cars at the event. The biggest marque was Evos, but the usual suspects also showed up: M3s, Porsches, Vettes, etc.
Some lessons for future organizers of track days:
1. DO NOT allow pure novices on a race track without an experienced driver or instructor riding along. Nobody was hurt at Autobahn this day, but they could have been. It is especially bad when the ricer rookies are running Evos that have been modded. Imagine taking an 11-sec drag car down a 1,200 ft straight, then braking and turning in -- without any track experience! On street tires and street brakes! It's a recipe for disaster of biblical proportions.
2. If you run on a weekday, MAKE SURE the track gives you an experienced track crew. Otherwise, you may lose hours of track time while Mo and Curly figure out how to hook up all those Evo tow cables.
Rich
*From the days when they still made twin-engine Bonanzas. Rich doctors would buy one, then "augur in" as Tom Wolfe put it, because twin-engine airplanes are not that easy to fly. The same analogy applies here with Evos.
