Dumbest things you've heard a DSMer say? :)

[Silver99OZ]

I've got a good one. So im at a local car show that I was in with another N/T owner that I know (17 year old). So we were walking around checking out all the cars when we came to a turboed integra gsr done up nicely. I had talked to the owner earlier in the day when he was checking out my car. Anyway we were looking around his engine bay cheching out his turbo parts (I was anyway). Then the kid points to the fluid resivors which had those wrist band things on them that are oh so JDM and says to his other friend that was with us, "Oh nice you know what those are for right? So the resivors don't explode while you are racing." My jaw dropped and I had to do a double take and say "What". He responds with "Yea dude thats what those are for, you didn't know that." He then proceded to talk the integra owners ear off about how he wants to turbo his 420A to make like 300HP. He went on to tell him how he has no money but he is saving for a $900 ebay turbo kit. The integra owner looked over at me with this look on his face like wtf is wrong with this kid is he serious. I smiled and walked away and went back to my car.

 

[XiKeiyaZI]

Woooooow. Really? .... x_x Cause racing those things causes soooo much pressure build-up in the fluid tanks..

 

[ramsack]

National Auto dbag: What engine you got in that thing
Me: Stock, but a non-turbo bottom end
National Auto dbag: That thing is gonna blow up
Me: I plan on just sticking with stock wastegate boost
National Auto dbag: Yeah but the turbo blocks have oil squirters, that thing isn't gonna last that long, you're gonna blow it up without oil squirters.
Me: Thank you

Not verbatim, but the dude is a dumbass.

Another one was my friend bought this GSX back from this stupid kid. He came to his house to get another car off him. He pointed at the AFPR that my friend installed on his old car and asked why the car needed 2 BOVs.

I was staying at same friend's house because he and his fiancee were on vacation and they needed me to watch their dog. The same stupid kit came and knocked on the door. His o2 sensor wire was roasting because it was sitting on the exhaust manifold and he had no idea what to do. I went and got a zip tie and fastened it to the A/C fan, and that was that.

To all the bleeding hearts who think people are dicks if they make fun of douche bags or misinformed people:

They are most likely misinformed because they are stupid and gullible, and will never learn, and won't listen to what you have to say. They are set in their ways and listen to people who are retarded, but good bullshitters. I choose to be a dick to these people because I am not living to gain friends, especially with morons. The fewer people I know and more alone I am, the better. And the ricer people just deserve it, whether they are dumb or just misinformed, because their taste sucks. I won't even engage the rest of the conversation with someone like that if I feel they are not worth talking to. I would rather not waste my breath than to just mess with them.

 

[crash89]

A few days ago my buddy was tradding his Gst for a s10 ### he wanted a truck. Well when we get to the meeting spot the other guys friend was look at the car while my friend and the guy were signing titles. The following was said:

him: does this car have a shift light?
me: no.
him oh, every turbod car Ive driving has had a shift light
me: Probly an aftermarket one.
him: no! they came stock
me: hmmm

Shortly after we left the kid (17 yr old) calls my friend and says "why is the car overheating and steam comming out of the rad cap?" haha we had driving close to an hr to the meet spot with no problems!

 

[Fotowntalon]

him: hey you have a tsi thats awd right?
me: yes that means its awd.
Fotown: Actually, its a legit question because they made both FWD and AWD tsi's.

fixed

 

[XiKeiyaZI]

fixed

I wasn't going to say a thing.

 

[Achelea]

A few days ago my buddy was tradding his Gst for a s10 ### he wanted a truck. Well when we get to the meeting spot the other guys friend was look at the car while my friend and the guy were signing titles. The following was said:

him: does this car have a shift light?
me: no.
him oh, every turbod car Ive driving has had a shift light
me: Probly an aftermarket one.
him: no! they came stock
me: hmmm

Shortly after we left the kid (17 yr old) calls my friend and says "why is the car overheating and steam comming out of the rad cap?" haha we had driving close to an hr to the meet spot with no problems!

Five bucks says he was bouncing off the revlimiter or never bothered to shift.

 

[slickers111]

it's borderline impossible with the guy's mods and possibly driving style? Furthest I've gone is 348 on a single tank.

Actually, my friend has a GS-T that got 414 Miles on a tank.
He was boosting alot too. He said he leaned the mixture.

Heres one.
Talking to a kid selling his GS.
Him: So here it is.
Me: What have you all done to it?
Him: Just maintenance and speakers.
Me: Hmm, Okay. Its got quite a bit of rust here.
Him: Yeah, theres alot of rust by the side squirts
Me: What?
Him: Yeah, we were gonna put on new side squirts, but we ran outta money.

Wow. New Side squirts.
Continuing with him saying whats all wrong with it.
Him: There is some problem shifting when driving, it kind of jerks when it shifts, and idols kind of high when driving fast.
Me: Hmm, alrighty. Good luck sellin it man. Hope you get what your asking.
1200 BTW.

What a retard. He should own a Honda.

 

[SBstar]

After running a 13.1 - other "dsmer" at the track.

That's really good for a 14b, but you're going to need at least a 16g to run a 12.

 

[97-gst]

double the boost, double the horsepower

I'm gonna blow my motor up by using launch control on dsmlink

And the guy i bought my car off of said that it made 400 horsepower on a dyno. It was still on t25

 

[yepes281]

Five bucks says he was bouncing off the revlimiter or never bothered to shift.

He probably didnt know he had to, there was no shift light.

 

[dented_coffee]

Just yesterday I was PM'ed by a guy saying that the 2010 eclipse will smoke any of the 90-99's. And that a 1G that can hit arround 10,000 R's without any chance of problems is a POS. I called him out and made him look like the fool he is in front of over 60 people.

Just the other day last week I was asked if I would race against a geo metro. They said that they are lighter and with smaller tires they can go faster than my heave piggy of a DSM. I just walked away and never even looked back just got in my car a peeled the helz out leaving 4 black streaks on the pavement. The look on their face in my rear view mirror was priceless.

 

[Fotowntalon]

I've always wanted to do a project geo, they are super light, i had a geo metro converyable, and was told i shouldnt drive it if there was a wind advisory out, because the wind gets ahold of it to easily. Granted stock i think they run close to a 20s 1/4

 

[dented_coffee]

this geo was rusted out and the exhaust pipe was the size of a drinking straw.

 

[Fotowntalon]

yeah my geo was rusted out to shit to. When changing the brakes, the car fell through the jack because it was soo bad (thankfully no one was under there at that time) You should of had him pop the hood, those 3cylinders are sooooo cute to look at.

 

[dented_coffee]

With how crappy the car looked and how much of a ghetto hill billy he looked like I bet there was a push mower motor in there held in place by ducktape. How big and heavy is that little 3cyl engine?

Ducktape = skidway chrome. Thats what we all call it here. Alot of people hide rust on cars with that crap.

My father had a blue geo metro before he passed away. It had no rust or dents on it anyware. He had a 4 banger in there. I know they made 3 cyl but never really seen one. I would like that 3 cyl engine for my awd gocart were building. I'm shure we can mount it up to the transmission to get her working.

We took a raptor gocart from TSC that we got for $400 because it was the display one and it didnt wanna stay runing. We found out after getting home that the fuel line was pinched because of a zip tie from the factory. Started her up drove it arround plowed threw a few trees to make shure its gonna be ably to take the abuse. I think that me snashing threw trees about 2 inches round and not causing damage means that she is sturdy and the harnesses/head restraints work great. We had a 2006 polaris sportsman 900 that got into an accident on the farm so we stripped her for everything. the cart is a 2 seater and is fair sized. 4 wheel disk breaks, all wheel independant suspension, awd on demand with an automatic transmission. All I need is a liquid cooled engine that has good power that wont fry the transmission.

 

[_97tsiawd_]

Not exactly a dsm'er but my friends GF when I went outside to leave their house

Her: is that turbo?
Me: yeah
Her: AWD?
Me: no, FWD
Her: Oh, those suck, only AWD's are good for anything
Me: yeah? you have a AWD DSM?
Her: no, but my ex-boyfriend had a 3000GT twin turbo
Me: Oh nice! (genuinely) modded?
Her: yeah, cold air intake and lowered, it ran an 11 second quarter mile pretty much stock
Me: wow! (knowing this is complete BS) does it have a roll cage? (as per PIR rules here in portland)
Her: no, doesn't need one
Me: i'm surprised they let him on the track without one, what kind of boost level was he running?
Her: just stock
Me: (being sarcastic) so he ran an 11 second quarter mile with a stock 3000GT? I had no idea those things were so fast stock! I need to get me one of those!

I then got in my car and laughed all the way home with my wife

 

[GsxEcutioner]

hey, They do weigh a lot, but doesnt take much for those to be quick either. stock I think is a mid 13. IIRC

 

[jrohner]

I need a louder BOV; I want to vent my BOV cause it'll be louder.

Saying they have a "Stage x" for anything (other than maybe cams or a clutch).

(It's annoying how upgrades for SRT4's are always stage x; "My car's fast as hell cause I got a stage 3 ECU". Stupid.)

 

[Bluefire16]

I read the first entry, the guy was an idiot himself. General rule of thumb, white smoke = coolant, blueish = oil, and black= running rich.

He said white = oil. Sometimes people just shouldnt talk, maybe thats why he only had 11 posts? haha

 

[Tanro]

also yes he said "6" speed, that should tell you how much he knows

Welllll technically reverse is a speed.

 

[Pirrofab]

with my 92 tsi fwd i made it to the shootout which is 420 miles from door to door on a single tank of fuel. when i pulled into the gas station. it took A FULL tank. it was on fumes pulling in. that comes to 28mpg. Then on the second trip with my car and my friends 92 tsi awd following along the way we both got 28 and 29mpg. then last year on a seeping headgasket in my fwd i managed to get 31mpg. some people may remember my primered fwd with the writing in the windows about the blown head gasket. I had loose change donated by people at the track that sunday. the wing had about 2 dollars on it.

 

[90tsiPA]

Back when my car was mostly stock I noticed this kid looking at the front of my car and I said "what are you looking at?" he looked over and quickly responded "I was seeing if it was turbo". He said he has a 2g n/a. I was baffled especially because my car still had the dohc 16v turbo stickers on the side. Oh and this link I just got today 2.6 turbo http://york.craigslist.org/cto/1890194952.html

 

[AK Maniak]

Welllll technically reverse is a speed.

Welllll technically reverse is a direction

 

[tode5tool]

about a month ago, i ran into a dsmer who had a white gst like me. i wanted to take a look at his car, after he told me he was running 22 psi on a big16g. the fist thing i looked at was the turbo.. it was obviously a stocker t25. i didn't have the heart to tell him he was a retard and he got ripped off that day. but did a few weeks later.. he dont talk to me any more.. that shit was funny.