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You know you're a dsmer when... if [Merged 8-8]

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boostaddctd

Probationary Member
5
0
Oct 6, 2002
bedminster_pa
1= If you've ever had to explain crankwalk to a mechanic....

2=If you have a garage full of spare engines, just in case....

3=If you've tried to bolt your old 14b onto a riding lawnmower....

4=If you've hit your head on the B-pillar during an AWD launch....

5=If you have a running tab at the local tranny shop....

6=If you go rallying in your daily driver....

7=If your driveway has divets in it cause your car never moves....

8=If you have a trophy case full of Honda and Mustang emblems...

9=If you eat "rice" for dinner....

10=If people recognize your car by the sound of it's lifter tick....

11= If you drive 5 extra blocks for a gas station that has 1 more octane point.

12=If you get refused on your tread wear warranty every time you have tried, because of poor alignment.

13=If you bought half of your performance parts at Home Depot.

14=If every time you beat up a V8, they tell you that something was wrong with their car.

15=If you find yourself hanging with bikes out of the hole.

16=If people ask you what's wrong with your car because it keeps making this noise.

17=If your freinds get beat in a race and call you immediately after to rematch for them.

18 = You have had to send a tow truck back to the towing garage because you needed a flat-bed.

19 = You always request parts for an Eclipse because the parts stores always lookup the AMC Eagle.

20 = You drop whatever you are doing when the UPS man brings a new part for the car. And then spend the rest of the day installing it.

21= You only carry a Palm Pilot to log your engine's data.

22 = You change your tires, plugs and fuel curves for the winter.

23 = You know more about the 4G63 engine than some engineers at Mitsubishi.

24 = Your wife/girlfriend wishes your car never exsisted.

25=Your wife/girlfriend wishes DSMtalk never exsisted....

26- if you think your dsm should have come with a flatbed/tow truck following you from the factory.

27. If its one of the few imports a big fat farm kid can work on.

28=your car spends more time being broken than being driven

29=you dont let people drive your car into the bays because its "quirky"

30=you spent more fixing it than it cost

#31 -your eye automatically catches EVERY dsm that drives by on the highway

#32 your out driving/fixing in the winter more then you EVER wanted to be.

#33 (referring to 31) if it's a 2g non spyder, you quickly check to see if it has stock dual pipes. then turn back to see you are swerving off the road

#34 before racing someone, you 90% of the time know their engine, hp, and performance specs. and you usually know if you will win or not

#35 right before u start modding, some damn matainence thing breaks down (i.e. alternator, starter)

#36 u barely have money for fun time (teenagers)

#37 u wake up in the morning look out the window and go "ahhh, what a nice car" / you wake up and see your damn broken car and curse up a storm

#38 you look at riced out civics and roll your eyes

#39 - right after you get your paycheck, you get online and spend it all on parts the same day.

40 = Every tire shop/parking garage/car wash/repair shop guy stalls out when he lets out your ACT 2600 clutch.

41 = Every car with an alarm triggers in parking garages as to say "hello".

42 = Your exhaust note is so deep and unique that people expect you to pass by 1/4 mile before you get there.

43 = You wonder where all your money goes.

39- when you go to fix something minor you ALWAYS expect a major hassle and something else is GOING to go wrong.

40- dsmtalk.com is the best website to visit. no correction -THE ONLY WEBSITE TO VISIT!-

41=If your on a diet because you ran out of weight reductions for your car...

42=If a junk yard to you is an upgrade yard.....

43=If your car consists of parts from more than 10 other DSMs.....

44=If you always have to show your car in a garage.....

45=If you take offense to the word Riceburner.....

46=If you have a stick in your car, that's job is to prop up the hatch.....

47=If your pasanger window takes more that five minutes to get all the way up.

48=If you never put more than a quarter tank of gas in your car.....

49=If your DSM is the most unreliable car you have ever owned, but still your favorite......

50- the letters d-s-m-t-a-l-k on your keyboard are so worn off your keys on your keyboard that you can hardly make them out anymore.

51 - The UPS guy comes over for a beer on a regular basis

52 - Your bucket of extra parts pulls 60 bucks on eBay

53 - Paypal.com sends you christmas cards

54 = An average oil change involves fresh oil, new filter and draining the catch can.

55 = The pages of your shop manual have more wear than the tires on your car.

56 = You know the meaning of VFAQ.

57 = Some people would like to go to Europe, you'd like to visit Normal IL.

58- You get in alot of races because your car "auto-revs" for you.

59- You've custom fabricated a carbon fiber cup holder

60- You've almost been strangled to death by the automatic seat belt.

61- You can launch your oil dip stick 20ft.

62- You know that your car has a built in toolbox under the hood....

63- If a honda owner ever looked at you funny when you say "free mods"

64) You have a bucket full of nuts and bolts and your car seems to run fine and you can't figure out where the heck they go.

# 66 you carry ahydraulic jack with in your car at all times

# 67 when being towed you have to lift the front end of the car with your hands so the intercooler clears.

68- people call your car "valdez" after the oil tanker.

69- When the flatbed finally comes, you ask the tow guy for a piece of wood to put under your right rear tire (or left, if it's a 2G) so you don't scratch your muffler

70- If your AWD is equipped with automatic windshield wipers enabling system after every hard launch... (1G)

71- If everytime you launch, you can't see the damn road all the way through 1st gear (AWD)

72- Your headliner that's falling off combs your hair every morning (1G)

73- You hear a different vibration inside your car for different RPM points (1G)

73- You are afraid to grab your Crank Pulley and check for play (2G 7-bolt)

76 - you have watched 3 passengers break their glasses on the idiot belts

77 - when people say "is your car running again?" you say "kinda"

78 - every time you work on your car you end up with more bolts than you started with

79 - you have a laptop with a datalogger and manual CD on it in your car at all times

80 - you have ever explained "fuel cut" to a scared female passenger

81 - people that can "drive stick" stall your car out 5 times before they get it out of the driveway

82. people think you are just revving your car in neutral when in fact it is 1st gear (fwd dsmers)

83. you have gotten in many arguements on how "your car CAN't be THAT fast". it is a friggin 4 cylinder mitsubishi!!!

84. you have to explain to a mechanic of 35+ years what "boost creep" is.

85. if you slam 2nd hard enough your wipers turn on

86. you buy a k&n filter and call it an "intake"

87. you thought you blew up your dsm but in fact the dipstick popped out and sprayed oul all over the manifold causing massive smoke ( come on, we all freaked out a little the 1st time the dipstick blew out)

88. when someone asks you how the car is running you never say "awesome" or "great", just "its running"

82 - you hate the "hump" (1G AWD)

83 - your friend with a 5.0 says "at least my car is reliable"

84 - a normal weekend involves removing your transmission 5 times.

85 - you work all week so you can fix your dsm on weekends

86 - your friends think "phantom knock" is some sort of ghost movie

87. If you drive your car for 10 minutes, park if for 2 hours, come back out...it only takes 2 minutes to have the heat full blastin again.

88. You hear non-informed DSM'ers saying that chrysler over-all as a company sucks..and you have to reinform them that they are downing their own car.

89. After racing the honda boys with their "pimped" out cars you have to pop your hood for them to belive your cars almost completely stock (in my case)

90. You've owned something with the name Horsecock in it....;-)

91. You are completely dumbfounded when people say that eclipses and talons are hot but lasers are slow?

92. your mom claims a 4500 rpm launch "throws her back out"

93.- When over the school's intercom you hear "Excuse me but the white mitsubishi eclipse is still running."

94. When you get asked at least once a week if
'That Hump' is supposed to be on your hood.
95. Your friends with the tow company and they stop by every weekend to see what the new "project" is this weekend.

96. You dance every morning when your car cranks over.

97. when you ask your friend with a tow truck to tow your car every other day...

98. your "grocery getter" is a 12 sec car... LOL

99. You have the shop mannuel memorized

100. The local shop calls you to ask a question about a broken eclipse they have in there shop.

101. when people driveur car...and ask-whats that noise...you always reply with-which one

102. people driving ur car for the first time...get a new understanding forthe word torque steer -(fwd)
 
I can relate to a lot more of those than I'd like to admit to. hehe
 
Hell yeah, my thread found it's way over here now too:) It's up to like 117 now though. I'm thinking we need to make it down to a top 20 or top ten type of thing.
 
very funny, almost every one of those is oh so true for me, my mechanic knows not to even question me about the turbo system... because I know more than him, for the most part, about my car. He said to me once "your turbo kicks in earlier and harder than it should." LOL, I was like "ya, it's because I replaced the faulty plastic BOV with a stock 1g metal one, it doesnt leak..." he then proceed to tell me it would blow up my engine and that I should take it off... I explained how it doesnt' hurt anyting, bla bla turbo theory bla bla, then he shut up about all the turbo specific components! it was great
 
Originally posted by boostaddctd

64) You have a bucket full of nuts and bolts and your car seems to run fine and you can't figure out where the heck they go.

Oh man i know how that is
 
Originally posted by Mr.Samples
Oh man i know how that is

Same here, I've taken the interior apart to install a head unit, speakers and to get to the cluster, and now I have a center console full of screws that I have NO idea where they came from.

Oh well, the car doesn't rattle, so f$ck it. :thumb:
 
its on its way to 200. if you guys have any keep em comin. somebody mentioned putting the top 10 on a shirt and having something sayin "its a DSM thing, you wouldnt understand."
 
2=If you have a garage full of spare engines, just in case....

that statement is completely WRONG !!!!

I keep my spare parts in my hatch right next to my fully stocked tool box on the other side of my floor jack and jack stands, so I can rebuild on the side of the road. I am from the old school if you can't tell. LOL
 
-If the local parts store recognizes your voice on the phone and lets you run up a tab untile the car's running agian.

-your mechanic relies on your car to put his kids through college.

-The tow truck guy lets you accumulate frequent towing miles.

-The first questions friends ask when they see you is, "How's the car running?"

-You've ever got mad, kicked your car and then appologize to it and swear you'll never do it again.

-You've ever given yourself wiplash taking off from a stopsign.

-you can recognize sections in your shop manual based on the color fluid that's staining the pages.

-You and the local tow turck guy try to count how many times you're car has been on his truck in the last 10years and have run out of fingers to count on.
These are just a few that fit me.
 
Those are great. Evey one of them. Well except for 2 of them.
 
i love number 100 and 101 ........ i think those are the best
 
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