The The Official stupid things cops have said to you thread

[Achelea]

^^ What ever happened to the car? Totaled out? Fixed and running? Impounded? I've always been curious about the fate of the infamous Talon.

Also, A guy I work with used to have an Eagle Talon.

Coworker: I had a talon. 400 Hp on a Garret T28
Me: ya sure?
CW: Yeah. I didn't do the work myself. My buddy did. He said I was the best flashlight holder in the state.

me: .o( W T F )

 

[tips000]

in my old camaro on devils night (i was 17 and had a car full of kids) we were following another car full of kids and throwing huge pumkins and other assorted junk into peoples yards... as the cop pulls up behind us the kids in the car infront of me throw a huge pumpkin and nail this dudes house... the cop pulls me over (car filled with kids and tp) and says hey you forgot to turn your lights on before you left that gas station sir please be more careful hahahahahahhahaha.... he practically stepped on the pumpkin

 

[Ruthless]

about two years ago, i was doing 45 in a 35mph construction zone. i see a cop coming from the other way pass me and start to flip his lights on, and was about to flip a U, so i take the quickest right hand turn i can into a dirt road trailer park, flip my lights off (i tell you EVERY thing on my car was black from tailights to tint) and just lay low.

Now, usually this works for me because KS cops are too dumb to U-turn AND watch the car at the same time, so if you get out of sight before they turn your usually good. However, i didnt notice about 100 feet ahead from where i turned was ANOTHER cop in an abandoned parking lot.

Needless to say, i get busted.

They immediately assume I'm smuggling drugs or something because i "attempted to evade" as they call it. Now, a funny bit of information is that back then i was straightedge, which if you don't know, means you don't drink or do drugs basically. so weed or anything of the like had NEVER been in that car since i bought it about 4 years ago, and a few days before this incident, i Super-cleaned my car taking the carpet out completely to pressure wash it even. not a single speck of dirt was on that carpet or in my seats. but my car smelled like weed apparently.

the Pig that pulled the u-turn to catch me pulled me out of the car, cuffed me, pushed me against the side of my talon and my belt buckle smacked the quarterpanel leaving a small scratch. I muttered under my breath
"watch the paint, piggy." to which he retorted
"what did you say young man?"
"nothing officer"
"thats what i thought"

considering how much of a dick he was, i assumed i was screwed and decided to have a bit of fun with him while he was patting me down.
"hey i promise you i have no weed in there but have you confiscated any you could sell or share? i roll hella good blunts bro."
he said "shut the F**K up" as he threw me in the back of the car of the cop that i didnt see in the parking lot.

While he was ripping out every body panel in the car (broke a few too) i got to talking to the cop who's car i was in. she happened to be a mother with five kids (and to this day the only female cop i have seen in KS) and i talked to her about how i'm doing in school (straight A's 4.0 GPA in my senior year of High school) and where i plan to go with my life.

the guy cop asked her to come talk to him outside the car. no idea what was said but when the guy cop pulled me out he seemed alot nicer.

he told me no mary jane or tobacco was found (duh) and lectured to me about how the airsoft gun in my trunk was illegal to own in that county, and that they can take me to jail for that. the guy cop left leaving the female cop to write me the actual ticket, and without picking my interior panels up from beside the car, i might add.

she wrote me a ticket for 5 over. no speeding in construction, no evasion, not for going TEN over like i actually was, just 5 over. she said "dont screw up your senior year kid, i dont wanna see you in a cell five years from now. smiled, then left.



Quite possibly the most extreme case of good cop bad cop i have ever experienced.

 

[rlacasse1]

^^^^ You do know they can't just rip apart your car like that, right?????

 

[Ruthless]

^^^^ You do know they can't just rip apart your car like that, right?????

yeah, but considering how bad off the situation SHOULD have been, i wasn't going to pursue it.

 

[J_DiZ]

I was driving down the highway in my first car 1990 240sx at night when i see an older toyota, maybe a celica supra. It was clean as hell, going a little slower than the speed limit. I get up there and my friend and I are checking this car out as we are driving down the highway admiring it. Finally, after a few miles the guy inside the car starts freaking out and is like pull over screaming in his car. I say eff it and pull over. He walks up to the car I barely roll down the window and he starts his rant.

him: were you trying to race me
me: I was going the same speed as you for like 3 miles, If I was trying to race you I would have floored it
him: you were trying to race me
me: I dont even know who you are
him: I'm a sheriff and i have a gun, i can just start shooting and ask questions later
me: Im leaving

I left.

Now a couple that happened on the same day about cops being cool

I'm on my bike making a 350+ mile trip from the north tip of florida back to south florida doing a steady 120-140 about the whole way. Im starting to go around a bend and have a feeling there will be a cop on the other side. I let off the throttle at 120 and sure enough there he is. as soon as i pass him I immediately slow to the speed limit and get in the right lane, and wait and wait. I almost can't see him in my mirror by the time he pulls out.

He gets to me pulls me over.

Me: just wanted to make sure you knew i wasnt going to run
him: well if you were going to run you would have been long gone
me: true, but i dont run from the police
him: thats good, license please
me: sure

he goes and comes back
I really appreciate you stopping, most guys on sportbikes just run, im not writing you a ticket.
me: cool!
him: just for kicks do you know how fast i got you at
me(completely bsing) 85? (limit is 70)
him: hahahaha no I clocked you at 101, if you keep it at 85 you wont see any problems from us (FL hwy patrol)
me: thanks!

I left and slowed down a lot from there but about 90 miles later i get pulled over again by a fhp this time a woman

her:license, do you know how fast you were going?
me: no not really
her: I got you at 91, we usually dont roll until 15 over and i usually dont roll until 18 over
me: oh
her: well I appreciate you stopping, most people run
me: (thinking yes im not going to get a ticket again) well i dont run from cops
her: thats good so im only going to write you a ticket for 80 in a 70
mek

I went about my way.

Both cops were really awesome seeing as how i was speeding my ass off. Not only that, but I did not have a m/c endorsement either, which my bike could have gotten towed and impounded for.

 

[Gysgt Guy]

When I had my ralliart it didn't come with a front plate, cop pulls me over for it and gives me a warning. He said next time it would be a ticket.

About 2 hours later pulls me back over wanting to know why I hadnt gotten it taken care of...

I never really could understand what his problem was!

 

[rizzzo29]

I was 16 and it was my second day of driving, I was going over to my friends with him in the passanger, his house is down on road called sunset, its a 35 then 25 before I get to my friends.

I was driving my past car, a 99 galant, lowered, hids, rear window visor, rolling on steelies, and a cop pulls behind me and follows me for about a good 3/4 mile. Follows, pulls up next to me, falls back, runs my plates, speeds up and practically cuts me off, looks back at me and see's my lack of front plate, swing's back behind me and then pulls me over. I pulled into this little mom and pop parking lot because sunset is a very busy road.

Cop: License registration and proof of insurance sir
(second day of driving, F*** I dont have either with me I forgot to put them in here, and that new insurance law just went into affect ahh!!)
Me: What did I get pulled over for sir
Cop: LICENSE and registration sir
Me: I would like to know why I got pulled over (sounding kinda pissed)
Cop: walks to the front of the car, well why don't you have a front plate
Me: (Get out of the car) what? My step-dad put those on yesterday today is my second day with the car?, (BSing it was in my trunk, the bracket has broken and I wasn't going to just drill it into my bumper)
Cop: step back in the car sir! (I did) you seem a bit nervous are you on any drugs
Me: No sir not one bit, Its my second day driving, and first time being pulled over.
Cop: I also noticed your illegal headlights..
Me: they are street legal and are the same spec as the newer cars that come stock with them
(Second cop pulls up)
Me: (gets out of car) what is this???
Both cops, get back in the car sir
Cop2: ( brings out a dog)

Friends drive by laughing at me

Cop1: sir is it okay if we search your car
Me: Go ahead, but don't break any panels or rip anything up.
(Doggy does his rounds)
Cop2: it about that prom time so we have been trying to get rid of alot of the drugs around here, have a nice day guys (leaves)
Cop1: fix that front plate today please, leaves.


No tickets, never had me prove anything, I had no license on me, no insurance proof on me, and no registration. But I had nothing to hide.

 

[PurpSalad]

Try Washington state. They have a zero over policy in effect now. They can and WILL pull you over for 3mp over the limit. Plus the farging iceholes use unmarked minivans. Minivans. How'd you like to get pulled over and issued a ticket for 63 in a 60 by a minivan?

i see lights i always check. it isnt that hard to outrun a van or a prius.

if its something pushing over 300 horsies, ill pull over. if not then u already know ill be gone.

 

[rs2nr]

i see lights i always check. it isnt that hard to outrun a van or a prius.

if its something pushing over 300 horsies, ill pull over. if not then u already know ill be gone.

i hope your joking, if not than i hope you get caught. Really, why in the world would you place other innocent lives in danger for trying to get away. We actually have to cancel our pursuits if the car decides to run, soon as we get in pursuit it gets terminated, but agencies like CHP will not, and most of the time we are taught to use our discretion cause its not worth an innocent live. I really hope your joking.

 

[gabytech]

back on 06, I moved from Puerto Rico to Florida and took my 2G DSM with me... Obviously I took my car with me via boat shipping, sice duhhhh, Puerto Rico is an island. I got stopped once in Florida, I was driving around with the Puerto Rico licence plate, and the cop asked me if I brought the car with me driving it from Puerto Rico, I guess he thought I drove the car from Puerto Rico to Florida thru the key west bridge, what a MORON !!!!

 

[AK Thunder]

i see lights i always check. it isnt that hard to outrun a van or a prius.

if its something pushing over 300 horsies, ill pull over. if not then u already know ill be gone.

Lemme know when you run from the cops and they radio in a pursuit car and bust your ass so i can come buy your car at auction

 

[Alan11]

A week ago a cop in a bike at my college went up to me.

Cop: This is a "5 mph limit" campus. You were going like 20.
Me: I am going ten, an the limit is 20.
Cop: If you argue with me ill give you a citation
Me: For what Going 10 on a 20.?
Cop: Just park.
Me:

 

[PIMking]

Man you guys get screwed with way too much. Maybe it's because I'm older and wiser at 26 than I was ten years ago...

I got picked up in my dump truck a few summers ago and they wanted to inspect the truck. I was loaded at the time but we were hauling dirt away from a project and I had no idea how much I had on the truck. So they go through the inspection and everything is okay up until the DOT officer pulls out his portable scales. I start to sweat bullets since my truck was heavy empty let alone having a load on. I'm sitting in the car and they come back and proceed to tell me that I was a whopping 600 lbs over the bridge limit. I know the rules and opened my fat mouth and told them that I had 5% leeway over the limit and I know that leeway is 2300lbs so they couldn't give me a ticket. He then laughs and said "fine, I wont write you a $25 ticket for that; I'll write you a $200 ticket for no fire extinguisher..."

The best part is we were hauling dirt away from my shop at the time so I hand the ticket over to the boss and he paid it and got me a fire extinguisher about a half hour after that. Then a hour later I get pulled over by another DOT official and as he is walking up to my truck I just hand him the copy of my other ticket that I just got and opened the door to show him my new extinguisher and he simply laughs and said "good day" and goes back to his car. I thought that was comical to say the least, I didn't have to pay the ticket and it wasn't a moving violation so it didn't show up on my driving record.

I was also picked up the day I got my Talon finished and I didn't have a front plate on the car. The police officer was pretty cool and asked me:

Police: is this car leagal?
Me: sure it is; that is unless you want to get that pretty blue uniform dirty
Police: I will take your word on it, what are all those gauges?
Me: I tell him boost, Wideband, Turbo timer, Water Temp, Oil Pressure.
Police: is it fast? then he laughs " don't street race son" and he walks off...

Just be courteous and you wont have an issue most of the time

 

[DirtyDave21]

I got pulled over in my old car it was an '87 cavalier it had a 2.8 v6 with a 5 speed and it was slower than a Honda
Cop: your exhaust sounds kinda loud.
Me: ehh a lil bit.. i think something broke earlier.
Cop: what happened earlier?
Me: "I SAY LAUGHING and OBVIOUSLY joking" Just a few burnouts and some street racing.
Cop: "gets pissed off and says he's gonna write me a ticket.
Me: How? you have no proof unless your the one i was racing!
Cop: Boy, your lucky I'm nice! he hands me the ticket for the exhaust.
Me: took off and accidentally chirped the tires in second

i saw the same cop the next day at the local grocery store and he tried scolding me for chirping the tires. i told him my foot slipped off the clutch.

 

[Zmoney8907]

Before i had my dsm i got pulled over for having naked girls in the back of my jeep. good thing they let me go my mom would've beat my ass

 

[rlacasse1]

^^^^^^ More of that story.

 

[Bud92gsx]

The one time I got pulled over in my car, I was basically pulling into my destination..So I shut the car off rolled down the window and took the keys out of the ignition..The car was still running because my TT was still installed..Anyway the officer came up to my car and said, do you know why I pulled you over.."no" I said.. "well I pulled you over because you were doing the speed limit" No shit that's what he told me..Well I didn't get a ticket because my record was semi clean and he gave me a break..

Later on I found out that It's illegal to do the speed limit on Halloween night..Did not know that..SO FYI

But I do want to know more about the naked girls in the back of the jeep..

 

[DSM_love_GST]

once i was pulled over for my front plate in the windshield.
Cop: sees my fmic and asks why is your radiator so low
Me: It's an intercooler
Cop: a Whaaa?
Me: i explain what it is and that its for a turbo
Cop: Oh so you race?
Me: yes...
Cop: okay can i see your...
Me: but only at the track!
Cop: oh okay, well find a place for your front plate and have a nice night!

Another time I was pulled over while test driving a car.
Cop: know why I stopped you?
Me: no?
Cop: your tags are expired.
Me: I'm test driving the car...
Cop: gave me a ticket anyways.

Yet another time (cop was around a corner, couldn't see him until i looked in my mirrors)
I get stopped
Cop: know why I stopped you?
Me: no?
Cop: you were going 10 over, were you messing with me?
Me: What?
Cop: come on, I was in plain sight, you had to have been messing with me.
Me: Yep that's it, I wanted to test you and see if you were on top of your game, and you passed! but seriously no I wasn't.
Cop: okay well here's your ticket.

 

[dropped99gs]

I see some really funny stories in here and i can relate to a lot of them.

The police in this country are very under appreciated and it is because of a few cops who treat everyone like a criminal.

I have had too many run ins with the law to count. I would say about 80% of the time I run into a cool cop when getting pulled over. The rest basically walked up to my car ready to draw their weapon.

I recall an experience from about 4 years ago. I had a 01' V6 camaro with bolt ons, nothing special. I'm stopped at a light and notice a cop pull up behind me and I can tell he is running my plates. Everything was good on my car so I just smiled and said to myself "haha fish somewhere else". Well not even a block down the road he pulls me over. Upon reaching my door he reaches to his gun and unsnaps his holster and grips his weapon. The conversation went as follows -


Me: do you think you're doing??? Holster that f"ing weapon when you approach me.
Cop: *takes a half step back and removes hand from gun* "Don't you get an attitude I'll take you in right now!"
Me: I'm a disabled vet, college student, with no record whatsoever, why the F*ck are you unsnapping your holster and reaching for you weapon???!!!!!
(mind you I was actually yelling at him)
Cop: I'll approach you however I see fit. License and insurance.
Me: Yea sure, once you inform me why I'm being pulled over.
Cop: I don't see an exhaust and your car is too loud.
Me: I had the exhaust modified and an aftermarket muffler relocated under the vehicle and my car just passed inspection.
Cop: We'll see, wait here while i run your info.

cop returns like 30 minutes later, no b.s. I had at least 4 conversation with people on the phone while waiting for this guy.

He finally returns

Cop: Well everything checks out. (he then leans more toward my car and starts sniffing) Mind if i search your vehicle:
Me: I really don't have an issue with that sir, but why are you wanting to search my vehicle?
Cop: I smell marijuana, and I can see pot pieces in your floorboard.

Now I'm going to be honest, yes I do smoke, but rarely in my cars. And this particular day none had been in or smoked in my car. Now I really think about it, I had not even smoked that day.

Me: You've got to be kidding me right???
Cop: what??
Me: First you run my plates at the light, follow me, then pull me over to ask about my exhaust, now you are harassing me about having drugs on me. Now I can understand the exhaust part, but sir really? You've approached me like a hardened criminal, I have no record, I'm 30% disabled from the military and here you are looking for any reason you can to justify pulling me over and somehow finding a way to cite me.
Cop: Well I'm going to need you to step out while i search your car.
Me: usually i would just jump right out and let you, but if your are wanting to make this difficult so can I. I refuse to allow you to search my vehicle, I want you to call your Seargent out here and we can discuss this with him. I'm not stepping out of my vehicle for and unjustified reason.
Cop: I can make you get out.
Me: I would like to see you try.

this went on for about 10 minutes - finally i picked up my phone and started to dial 911.

Cop: hang up your phone right now!!!
Me: why? 911 dispatch will automatically call back on a hang up and possibly dispatch a unit.

dispatch answers and i proceed to tell her I'm being harassed by an officer and I require assistance and as I'm giving the location the officer says " Never mind the search have a nice day " and bolts.

Now, I'm a clean cut guy, driving a car in great shape w/ proper tags - what gives him the right to approach me basically about to unholster his weapon.

I am the first to agree if you are doing something wrong, you deserve to get caught and one day you will. If I'm pulled over and it is justified, it can be a cool cop, or a prick, i'm calm, compliant, take my ticket and shake their hand with a "be safe out there".

But yea, this story actually happened. Car was a base model 01' silver camaro, semi loud exhaust, stock wheels, nothing that would make you look twice or seem suspicious.

I can handle being harassed intially, but once I drop the disabled vet I expect respect, especially from a cop.


On a lighter note - good cop story -


Got pulled over in my 00 civic si - built w/ hi comp pistons - doing ~ 160 mph, My speedo stopped at 155........
(Before I'm slammed for promoting unsafe driving, I was 19 and had no regard for what could have happened to others if something had happened. Don't drive like how i just described. Risk your own safety and keep it on a track)

I pass a trooper in the side of the interstate, and as fast as I was running I thought I was gone. Drive a little ways and hit an exit and hide out was my plan. Well before I could exit the cop caught up with me !!! ::::

Turns out I passed 1 of like 5 Camaro SS trooper in the U.S. that were made for high speed pursuits on certain interstates where drug traffickers frequent.

He asked what I thought i was doing going that fast and I responded how I had a 6 hour drive back to base and 4 hours to get there and showed him my leave paperwork. Turns out he is Search and Rescue from back in the day. We b.s. for a little bit and he lets me go, telling me to slow down a little and nothing between here and there will be able to stop me. I asked if he would escort me and he said he would but he was actually waiting for a specific vehicle to come along. I would love to have been that trooper. He told me about some of the goodies on the hood A bike would have a hard time running from that car from what he said. And as fast as he caught me, I do not doubt it one bit.

But yea, cop was cool. Even initially approaching me he was pretty level headed considering i was doing almost 100mph over the speed limit on the interstate. If I were a trooper i would have pulled me out by gunpoint and the whole 9 yards. Thats attempted vehicular manslaughter buddy. I could have had my entire life ruined but that one cop gave me a break.

Always try to respect cops/troopers - no matter what - drive safe - watch your speed - keep yours tags and insurance current - and keep on cruisin.

 

[Hyoctan92]

I was driving with 3 other peole in my 88 Shelby-Z and Ipulled out of an automotive college dorm and got into it a little bit and then seen lights in my rear view, I had just thrown 3rd gear and then pulled over.
cop; you in some kind of hurry or something?
mw:no why how fast was I going?
cop: 55 in a 35
me: I really dont think so sir
cop: license, reg, and insurance
me: here you go sir.

I got a ticket for 55 in a 35 and the funny thing about that is.... my car already has a rod knock and wont rev over 4500. It was reading so much knock that it barely could have gotten to 45 in the 150 yards between the drive for the dorms and the time I noticed the light behind me. I obviously fought the ticket and when I went to court the prosecutor turned out to be a big car guy. I talked to him before the hearing and was explaining to him that my car had a rod knock and wasnt running well enough to do the speed that I was cited for in as little time as it took to be pulled over. I got a 0 point violation and fine... the nicer you are to them the more likely you will come out clean.

 

[sypherzero]

I was riding with a friend of mine to a meet one time, and two other boardies were following us there. 3 cops out of nowhere come up on us like a bat out of hell and blue light us. I'm riding in a 99 Impreza sedan set up for dirt. One car was a EK coupe, with wheels and an exhaust, and the other was a gutted B18 EG hatch. All of us going 55 in a 55, and one behind the other in the right lane. Cops come up on either side of the Suby and the one on the drivers side asks my friend for his license and registration. Then they ask for my license(?), and tell us we were drag racing. I start laughing, and tell my friend congrats that he must have won, because he was up front. They give us our stuff back, while giving us the stink eye, and tell us to be safe and they leave.

I did however get pulled by a state trooper in a Focus I used to have, just to tell me to move over if a cop gets on my ass. That was a moment, haha.

 

[GSLENK]

I have gotten pulled over in an 85 vette with 3" straight pipes back to magnaflows plenty of times. Usually they say I SOUNDED like I was going fast. I was like oh great. no tickets were involved.
I let my mom borrow the car for one of her moms nights out. She got pulled over and she drives like a grandma. She stops for green lights because she thinks they are gonna turn yellow ( I tell her that because she never runs a yellow).

On a side note, one of the stupidest things cops say in general, unrelated to cars of course, is that snitching will get you out of trouble. I have seen some suckers snitch, get all kinds of people mad at them and still get charged hahaha. I guess thats what snitch b!tches get.

 

[Leonthefaded]

So a honolulu police officer pulls up next to me at an on ramp stoplight, as I'm on my way to the local hotspot for... cars. Rolls down his window points to the rear bumper of my car and asked "Whats the bear for on the bck hanging there? I seen alot of guys doing that on thier cars."

As shocked as I was that he asked me that instead of the usual harassment from the police, I simply replied "Its trendy" He nodded in agreement and then proceeded to pull over the Civic Hatchback that was moving alittle too fast from the opposite side of the on ramp.

 

[turboglenn]

This is why i don't miss Norther Va, PA, Maryland or about any other east coast metro area i've lived in. They have WAY more major shit going on but are constantly pulling people over for no reason other than getting a ticket quota or hoping to make that "standard traffic stop" that turns into "the bust of the year" for smuggling or some shit. I can't even count how often i was pulled over as a teen (and i thought that's why it was too) But noow i'm in my mid 30's and my friends that live back east still say they are constantly stopped like we were when we were young and doing dumb shit.

Out here in Nebraska, we are a pretty good size city, but our crime rate is pretty upbeat/rampant and the cops focus on that, not pulling over people for dumb reasons and i thank god that i've found a place where the police aren't brainwashed into the Nazi-know-it-all types that they seem to breed back east (although i still miss the east coast i don't miss the police out there)

I haven't got a thing against an officer at all, i commend them on their thankless jobs, and i thank them for all they do and for as nice as the ones out here have been to me when i have been stopped for really doing something ilegal, (speeding, wheelies years ago, tint etc..)

Here in NE motorsports is a large part of the way of life for most, circle track racing, drags etc.. some one in every family has something fast..

But the best part is you actually have to do something worth being pulled over for to get messed with, and even then we aren't gettign searched for no reason and such like many east coast stops go down.

Our cops are focused on fighting the meth problem, and the troubles it brings. Hell i don't even smoke weed anymore (havne't for a ong time) but here they usually grind it into the dirt and ticket you at most (next state over though iowa, a seed = arrested)

Sorry i don't have a cool story, but by being respoectfull, stopping when im being pulled or they light up cherry's behind me and just being a civil person about whatever they say and my response wether it in defense or agreeance with their statements, i've been treated very well by the police out here and I thank all the NE cops for being realistic about life, cars and what's really and "offense" and what's not

I think the dumbest thing i've ever been stopped for on the east coast was "object hanging from rear vioew mirror to obstruct vision" just wanted a reason to stop me it was in a town i was known in for driving illegal dirtbikes on streets, racing weed etc.. (when i was 17)

Dumbest thing i've ever been stopped for here was leaving work on a construction site at 11PM and having all the numbers on my equipment ran, but the cops were really cool, didn't want to bother with anything but seeing if i was one of the people that had been burglarizing construction sites and stealing expensive tools/equipment (this = working on fighting REAL CRIME) And i had a great conversation with the cops overall, thanked them for doing some real work bacause as i told them "it's good knowing you're workin on this problem because my tools are my living and it's good to see some one is working to help those of us who do get ripped off and can't make our living untill we replace/recover our working tools.

I"m also a freemason and do a lot of volounteer work with the state police here and even they are way cooler than any statey in any other state i've ever been in.. Yea they've ticketed me for tint, but oh well.. once in 14 years is nothing comapred to the almost once weekly minimum of being pulled for something dumb back in VA/MD/D.C> metro area