Is it okay to punch 7 year olds in the FACE?

[XiKeiyaZI]

I like your approach to situations...

It's not the kids fault. It's the Upbringing.

A parent's responsiblity being neglected, to say the least, falls as the issue here.

 

[LandoAWD]

Kids are a product of their environment, contrary to the asinine "kids will be kids" BS above. Want to know how many times I threw ANYTHING at my parents that wasn't a baseball or a frisbee? ZERO

 

[onlyhonestone]

Kids will be Kids, Every kid does stuff like that dude. but if you really wanna teach her a lesson take her for a ride in your gst and scare the living crap out of her. Throw her back in the seat so hard with that 20g that you make her cry and tell her to say sorry for being so annoying and you'll let off the gas

^^ yeah whatever that means, look dude i have three girls and none of them ever acted like that, i would talk to her mom and if she gives u permission to discipline her then whoop her monkey A$#!!, seriously i dont hesitate to pop em in the back of the head , kids will be kids? what the hell was that? i'm a dad and thats not how kids r suppose to act, and by the way dont put a 7 year old in your car and drive like a retard, first u r endangering her life, and second u could go to prison.

 

[black_gst]

Punch the mother in the face. Far less illegal (still jailable), but gets to the root of the problem.

after reading all the serious comments i when i got to this. thanks Kris just what i needed to get my work day rolling

 

[LandoAWD]

after reading all the serious comments i when i got to this. thanks Kris just what i needed to get my work day rolling

It's 40% serious. The concept is true, but the execution of the concept is probably not the best plan.

 

[brownfinger]

I didn't read a single post, but : NO. You'll eventually regret it.

 

[laserspeeddemon]

My children are WELL behaved. I've only spanked my oldest (and by spanked I don't mean one bop on the head. I mean a welted hand prints on his butt) because despite being told not to, he played with "chemicals" (Comet, Bleach, Windex, etc.). He thought Comet looked like snow coming out and so he dumped it all over the bathroom floor. It was about 5-10 minutes since I last saw my kids (I try to be aware of where my kids are all the time). When I found them, my oldest was giggling as the Comet was falling out of the can and my youngest was laying face down in a pile of it, inhaling it. It nearly put his brother in respiratory arrest. After taking care of the youngest one, including calling poison control, I whipped the crap out my oldest. Then I went down stairs and yelled bloody murder at my wife for leaving the cleaning tray out. She thought I was going to whoop her. The reason for the tray is so we can get the cleaning supplies out and put them away very easily, under the sink (which is baby-proofed).

My wife has only left the chemicals one other time. And my son got me and told me so I could put it away. Other than that, my tone alone will control my kids. My kids understand that there are consequences for their actions. Like above, if my kids don't eat dinner, they starve until breakfast, but they still have to sit at the table. When my son refused to clean his play room one day. I would not let him go to sleep. He started around 7:30PM. Around 11:00 PM he was bawling as he cleaned up his room and finished at 11:30PM. We have modified that. He starts cleaning around 7:30 PM. At 8:00PM anything left on the floor goes in the trash. He tried to call our bluff once. We filled up 4, 40 gallon bags with his toys. And I made him follow me to the trash can and throw it away and then my wife made watch the dump truck carry it away. That was nearly 3//4 of his toys. He lost all the controls for his video game console, nearly all his train tracks. We have not had a problem since. And here is the other thing. He does not get mad at US for HIS actions. He understands, HE was wrong and HE suffers the consequences.

They ask to be let down from the table. The say, "Please", "Thank you","Mr/Mrs."

Don't get me wrong. I love them unconditionally and they love me back. Those who spare the rod of discipline hate their children. Those who love their children care enough to discipline them.

BTW my son is ADD and it gets worse around other kids. THE ONLY WAY TO CONTROL IT IS THROUGH DISCIPLINE!!!

 

[XiKeiyaZI]

Kids are a product of their environment, contrary to the asinine "kids will be kids" BS above. Want to know how many times I threw ANYTHING at my parents that wasn't a baseball or a frisbee? ZERO

Well, I can't agree with all of this.

I was raised in a terrible environment. My mother was a drug addict, my father was abusive. I ended up bouncing from place to place...I landed with a family who was well off, I had everything I wanted... but around the time I hit 12 I started to realize something .... I was ashamed.

when I went to school... I saw these kids with their parents dropping them off. These smiles on their faces...hell,...even the ones who were embarrassed with the way their parents were would make me jealous. For a while, I toiled with emotions and became one of those 'bad seeds' who went to school and beat the hell out of anyone who annoyed me. But in the back of my head I was constantly thinking " This isn't right. "

At 15 I realized something that I don't think many other people do who actually grows up in a rough environment until it's far too late. I don't want to be like them. And by 'them' I meant my parents. I was always sharp in school, but I was also cocky. MY SATs were so high in 5th grade that I had a GARAUNTEED spot in Duke when I graduated as long as I held above a B average. But I didn't care, I had no one to prove myself to. Before I wisened up, I had no one I considered family. I'd go to school, act like some horrible bastard child(which I was) but when a test would come around I'd ace it without a second glance. My ACT's in 10th grade was a 28. I went back 2 years ago and got a 30. But I'm off point, kind of, here.

When I realized that wonderful thought that I didn't want to be like my real parents, I began to see the things that linked me to them. I began severing link after link, cutting emotions and replacing them with pride and determination. I wanted to be everything that they never could be. It was a long road and I KNOW that I am still close to my immature side, but I'm far more mature than most young men my age. I have an office job, I own my own home, I enjoy a hard-days work, never touched a single drug aside from basic soda/food addictions and prescription meds when I shattered my ribs in a car wreck. When I deicded to take the path I chose to get to where I am, I had no one there to direct me, to tell me what to do.. all I had was the fact that I needed to do the best I could, to become a good person so that I didn't become like my parents. I didn't and I still don't want to ruin a childs' life when I help bring them into the world. I refuse to have a child and have them live a day of their lives truly regreting that they had been born.. that they were lost and confused because I wasn't there for them. Most people self destruct and become our average criminals. Well, I like to think that I'm a fine example of self-control and that I turned out pretty damned well despite my childhood. I knew that i had to learn REAL FAST how the world worked, otherwise it would eat me alive.

IN SHORT, FOR THOSE WHO DON'T WANT TO READ: You CANNOT say that the environment that a child grows up in defines the child. You can twist it to mean what I'm about to say, but simply saying "A kid who grows up in a bad household will be a bad person" is a cop out and a lack of responsibility. I took in my horrible childhood and decided that I wanted better for myself. I wanted to live a happy life. When I have kids, I'll do the same for them. I'll be there, raise them right, treat them respect and dicipline. If I have a son, I'll teach him the difference between a man, and a respectable human being. If I have a daughter, I'll show her the difference between a lady and a slut and how to respect herself.

80% of you are fathers. I'd have KILLED to have a father when I was younger. But you CANNOT define the kid by their situation. You can put twins together, living the same lifestyle, and they'll come out differently. It's how the child adapts to it. I simply adapted by first manipulating all of my feelings into disgust for people, and then feathered it into pride which is where I am now.

Sorry for the novel... but I felt that was appropriate. The Parent's job is 75%. The childs job is the other 25%. It's how the two communicate and relay their feelings to one another that defines the outcome.

 

[esoteric]

ADD is not ADHD.

 

[LandoAWD]

We're talking about a 7 year old, not a grown up. Your novel is mostly irrelevant.

I was in the TIP program for Duke as well. I made my own bed in HS, and now I'm just some lowly, senior IT dude.

 

[XiKeiyaZI]

We're talking about a 7 year old, not a grown up. Your novel is mostly irrelevant.

I was in the TIP program for Duke as well. I made my own bed in HS, and now I'm just some lowly, senior IT dude.

Look at it as you will, it's there to relay that despite the process of parental guidance, a kid CAN turn out to be a good, productive human being.

If this 7 year old is lacking the dicipline of a good parent, then you cannot simply brand the kid as a bad kid. If you have an issue with it, either disregard the kid completely and HOPE they turn out okay, or step in yourself and do something.

Something about kids hits a nerve. You, I will assume, grew up with parents who did a good job. As you just said, you made your own bed in HS. My Novel simply relays that even though we grew up differently, that I turned out just as well in the end. It all relies on how the kid adapts and if there is anyone, at all, around to help direct them. If no one is there, it depends on the mindset of the kid themselves.

 

[LandoAWD]

Again, we're talking about a 7yr old. I didn't say "adults are a product of their environment", I said "KIDS...".

The thread is about a kid, not the 10 year old that has developed more advanced reasoning, not the 16 year old who rebels (or maintains a 4.0), not the 20+ who's doing their own thing. Just a bratty 7yr old who hasn't had the appropriate amount of discipline and positive attention, and is too young to sort out that what they are doing is wrong due the lack of aforementioned guidance.

I'm not disputing your point, only questioning the relevancy to the topic at hand.

 

[XiKeiyaZI]

Oh, I know. I completely understand the reasoning. And yes, it's about a 7 year old. But she won't be 7 forever. A few years from now she might be perfect, or.. she might be complete scum.

The fact that she IS 7, determines that RIGHT NOW is the time to do something besides b!tch about how crappy her mother is as a mother. When you look at a kid, do you JUST see a kid, or do you see a person with a life ahead of them? That's what I'm trying to make accountable.

You want to hit the kid for being a spoiled little brat? It'll turn her into a bi*** as an adult. If you want her to turn into someone who is a good person both at mind and heart, stop fvcking being so irresponsible as an adult and show that kid that you care about them even if they grind every nerve in your body.

So, in regards, that is my point and That is relevent to the OP.

 

[MattUnderwood]

Okay, I wanted to go through a few topics brought up here.

1.) ADD does exist, but it's only fractionally prevalent as people believe. It's just something that gets over diagnosed because the listed symptoms are broad and quite vauge. Unless she's been seen by a clinical psychologist and diagnosed properly, internet diagnosis or the pediatrician saying it is marginally true.

I should know, I'm a poster child for ADD, Oh Shiney- er, back on topic.

2.) I've seen kids act like this, and it's usually because the kid is never punished for wrong doing, so the kids never learn respect. I've seen houses, cars, collectors items, campers, toilets, beds, etc etc get ruined, and the mother only stands aside and goes, "I was abused as a kid and I won't abuse my kids" mistaking discipline for abuse. (Getting them the other way around is wrong of course.) Or the other side of saying, "She's (Two years old/got ADD/bipolar/special/lost her father/victim) etc etc to give the kid a free pass, or an excuse to their behavior.

I agree with you 1494r5949549% because anymore kids are able to get away with murder from their parents it seems. I work at a movie store and there is a kid who is the rudest little shit I've ever seen in my life and he kept asking me the same question one day when I was helping a customer, so I finally just said with my voice raised WE DON'T HAVE THE DAMN MOVIE, CAN YOU HEAR? the kid who is 13 and is trying to be thug goes running out the door and goes and gets his mom where she yells at me, because her son has "something wrong with him" so I just did the right thing and said I was sorry but inside I really wanted to just yell that the thing thats wrong with him is he doesn't get his ass beat when he does bad things.

I know when I was little and growing up, if I did 1/2 of the things that kids are getting away with, my mom would beat my ass until it was fire red.

Next: I was diagnosed with ADD as well with bipolar and I never acted like the girl in the original post. If I was you, I would talk to the mom and tell her that you've seen kids like this before and they only get worst unless they are shown discipline. If I was the child's parent I would have beat its ass and put a prison bed in their room for them to sleep on. I hate how everyone says you can't spank your kid anymore, its worked for every other generation. I really REALLY do not want to see the future when these kids are grown up.

Sorry for the long post, I'm just getting tired of kids.

 

[DannyGSX]

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[bane3d]

As a father of an aspergers child, I can tell you it's not easy. Here's a good test to see if the kid is ADD or at least on the autistic spectrum. Give them a sh1t ton of caffeine. My son was aspergers due to bacteria is his system processing gluten improperly. We changed his diet, killed off all of the bacteria, and then replaced it with good bacteria cultures (home-made yogurt). He went from the mentality of a 2 year old to a 4 year old in about 1 year. He was 6 at the time. (Nobody likes dealing with a 5 year old still in diapers and unable to speak a coherent sentence). Back to the point, caffeine took the edge off of my son. We eventually got him to the doctor and medicated him. The first day he was on meds, he was suddenly able to speak coherently and I had my first real conversation with my son. (6 years old at the time) Needless to say, I was crying. Now he is on meds just to get through the school day and then they wear off at night and he's just ADHD.

Take some cool aid, mix in an enery drink with 200mg of caffeine and give it to the kid. If she settles down a bit, then she needs to go to a doctor. The kid is going to have a lot of social issues at school and may end up becoming self destructive because she can't control herself. If she doesn't settle down at all and becomes more hyper, it's parenting or environmental.

d

 

[vannaksgsx]

Smack that kid. Who says you shouldn't hit your kids...cmon man! Thats why kids these days turn out to be punks with no repsect for anyone. But ultimately, if the mom lets her child abuse her like that, then thats her problem. I used to BEAT my cousins when I was younger- I was the oldest cousin in the family. I would Homey the Clown their asses until they cried. They were scared sh*tless of me. If nothing else, at least her sister will respect you. If you treat her little sister like your own sister, and whip her into shape...your gf's mom might actually appreciate it.

 

[BigBeans]

Not your kid, not your problem.

Avoid her like the plague, tell your GF that she is not to bring her sister anywhere with the two of you, etc. Unfortunately, you have no business raising your hand to someone else's child.

My dad would have whooped my ass if i did shit like that. He only had to do it a few times, then once i knew he wouldn't hesitate to do it, i learned not to try that shit, because it wouldn't end well.

 

[Red97Eclipseboy]

Shit, that's some terrbile parenting. If that mom doesn't grow up herself and be a parent, that kid is going to get so much worse. Not all kids are like that. My girlfriend has a 5 y/o, of course she has her 5 y/o moments, they all do, but no where near that. She's very firm with her child. Work wonders. Overall, for a 5 y/o, she's a great kid.

Don't subject yourself to it, dude. Stay away from that kid. It's not your job to raise her, nor should your blood-pressure be rising over a 7 y/o that's not your blood.

 

[yepes281]

Well one thing is, I in no way feel like i have the right to punish a kid who isnt mine with out permission. Also her mom speaks very little english so its kinda hard to communicate. And i honestly dont know what to say,"is it okay if i give your child an ass-whopping because, you FAIL at being a parent." The only thing i feel as if i can do is talk to my girlfriend about it but in the end shit doesnt happen, i honestly just wanna post this in a link on her facebook and be like, tell your mom this shit, but shed be PISSED.

And i gave her sister a monster before because i though itd be funny, but nothing happend.

 

[ineedagsx]

what do you say to a girl with 2 black eyes? NOTHING she's already been told twice

 

[casperfast]

shooting from the hip, no kid hitting. No one said you couldn't duct tape them to something so they are immobilized. Just use caution when taping over mouth etc. If their nasal passages fill with vomit you get the chair

my buddies cusin was visiting from mexico (10 year old girl)...... didnt speak any english other than f, sh, bit.... so she keeps walking into the office and un-plugging the computer while we are on ebay buying things. then she takes the tv remote and hides it from us........ we duct taped her to the tree in the back yard standing up, even her head. she starts screaming some crap i dont understand and the f bomb a bunch. his mom comes home "what the hell is going on here" we told her and she asked her in spanish "are you going to leave the boys alone and get the remote for them?" she said " no F U" so his mom said "well, i geuss just leave her there for a while" .............. so try the duct tape.... she never effed with us again

 

[dsm-onster]

Shit, that's some terrbile parenting. If that mom doesn't grow up herself and be a parent, that kid is going to get so much worse. Not all kids are like that. My girlfriend has a 5 y/o, of course she has her 5 y/o moments, they all do, but no where near that. She's very firm with her child. Work wonders. Overall, for a 5 y/o, she's a great kid.

Don't subject yourself to it, dude. Stay away from that kid. It's not your job to raise her, nor should your blood-pressure be rising over a 7 y/o that's not your blood.

He may love that child. He may be prepaired to adopt it. He may think that parenthood is more than promotion of his genome.

If that is the case, then yes, there is nothing wrong with a sound spanking. It's good for the child. They will be far happier in the long run. . . Proper discipline, though not palatable immediately, always feels good in the long run. He/she will respect you for making the right decision, when you didn't have to. . .

 

[DGajre777]

I have a 6 year old, and if he talked that way to either me or my ex-wife, he'd get a spanking of his lifetime from both me and my ex-wife. Some kids these days walk all over their parents, it makes me sad. No, it is not okay to punch a 7 year old's face. That kid is going to punch someone at school at get in trouble, if she hasn't already. If she has a.d.d, that's a whole other set of problems.

Bottom line is that you aren't the kid's parent. If you think her mom's parenting skills suck (which I believe they do), that's fine, you are entitled to that opinion. But it is the mom's responsibility to raise her child the way she wants to. Is the dad even in the picture? Maybe she needs a male role model to tell her not to talk to her mom that way. Kids sometimes will listen a male and think of them as an authoritative figure and think of the female as a care taker.

It pisses me off, when I see parents smoke in a car with 2 kids in the back seat. But guess what, they aren't my kids. And if the parents want to give their kids lung cancer in 10 years, there's nothing that you or me can do about it.

On the flip side, unless this girlfriend is going to end up being your wife someday, don't worry about it. If it bothers you that much, stop going to her sister's place and tell your gf to not talk about her sister or her child in front of you... or find another girlfriend.

 

[ineedagsx]

yea screw that shit dont go there and if she gives you shit about it then just do the smart thing and put the phone down, a kid thats not yours is not worth getting this pissed about, just laugh at your girlfriend and say "I'm not dealing with that child anymore, i dont need to"