i found this funny

[na90dsm]

When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly
discovered that ball point pens would not work in 0 gravity.

" To combat this problem, NASA scientists spent a decade
and $12 billion developing a pen that writes in zerogravity,
upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including
glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to
over 300* C.

The Russians used a pencil.

Enjoy paying your taxes this year

 

[Sotarts]

Originally posted by na90dsm
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly
discovered that ball point pens would not work in 0 gravity.

" To combat this problem, NASA scientists spent a decade
and $12 billion developing a pen that writes in zerogravity,
upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including
glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to
over 300* C.

The Russians used a pencil.

Enjoy paying your taxes this year

. Was it meant to make people believe it's true though?

 

[na90dsm]

actually i dont know, i found it damn funny though:laugh:

 

[luv2eclipse]

Alright here's a joke I heard the other day.

This guy went on a business trip to japan. He went out drinking the first night he was there and he met a japanese chick in the bar. She didn't speak any english. The guy was like what the hell and took her back to his hotel. He started f*cking her and she kept saying Ching Ching, Ching Ching. The guy was like what the f*ck. But he just kept going. The next day he went out golfing and he saw a japanese man hit a hole in one. Immediately the ### started yelling Ching Ching, Ching Ching. After hearing that that really puzzled that guy. So he spent the rest of the night trying to figure it out. He didn't figure it out so he just said screw it and went to the bar again. He met another japanese chick that spoke english. So for the hell of it he told her Ching Ching, Ching Ching. She started laughing. He asked her what it meant. And she said why. He explained and then she began to laugh even harder. After she calmed down she told him that Ching Ching means "Wrong Hole".

 

[na90dsm]

i like that


heres a good one


this guy go into the bar,this huge redneck guy with a t-shirt on that says i hate ######s. so he walks into the bar and orders a bud bottle and the bartender says" i cant have you in here with that shirt that says that, i have a lot of colored peopl ewho come in here as regulars and i dont want to loose there buisness." so the guy says ok and the bartender tells whim to sit in the back corner outta sight so he could finish his beer and go. he sits down in the back and just hangs out.

inb walks this block dude, huge guy with a monkey on his sholder. the bartender is like freakin and is like ok here it goes. so the block guy takes a step forward and puts the monkey down. the monkey has a coffe can and is going around and collecting change from table to table. he slowly works his way to the back of the bar. by this time the bartender is flippin and cant wait for it to be over. so the monkey gets to the rednecks table and shakes the can. the redneck stares for a second and puts a $20 in the monkeyts can. the monkey tips his hat and leaves. the black guy leaves after that.
the bartender goes to the rednecks table and goes wqhat the #### was that. the redneck goes" what". the bartender goes youhave a shirt on that says i hate ######s but you gave the monkey a $20 in the can what the ####"

the redneck goes, yea i hate ######s but i dont have anything against there kids"

 

[Toppel 2g]

rofl..... ahhh ... funny shyt, very funny...

 

[Sotarts]

.
na90dsm, I think you should delete your post before you get banned. Seriously.

 

[greathuskie]

Originally posted by na90dsm
i like that


heres a good one


this guy go into the bar,this huge redneck guy with a t-shirt on that says i hate ######s. so he walks into the bar and orders a bud bottle and the bartender says" i cant have you in here with that shirt that says that, i have a lot of colored peopl ewho come in here as regulars and i dont want to loose there buisness." so the guy says ok and the bartender tells whim to sit in the back corner outta sight so he could finish his beer and go. he sits down in the back and just hangs out.

inb walks this block dude, huge guy with a monkey on his sholder. the bartender is like freakin and is like ok here it goes. so the block guy takes a step forward and puts the monkey down. the monkey has a coffe can and is going around and collecting change from table to table. he slowly works his way to the back of the bar. by this time the bartender is flippin and cant wait for it to be over. so the monkey gets to the rednecks table and shakes the can. the redneck stares for a second and puts a $20 in the monkeyts can. the monkey tips his hat and leaves. the black guy leaves after that.
the bartender goes to the rednecks table and goes wqhat the #### was that. the redneck goes" what". the bartender goes youhave a shirt on that says i hate ######s but you gave the monkey a $20 in the can what the ####"

the redneck goes, yea i hate ######s but i dont have anything against there kids"

and thats funny because????

 

[AlecW81]

It's funny in a politically incorrect way.... the best racist jokes I've ever heard were told by some of my black friends... if they can tell them, than all your lily white a$$es can stop acting all offended when someone tells an "off-color" joke. Boo Hoo...

 

[DSMRomEo]

Originally posted by na90dsm
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly
discovered that ball point pens would not work in 0 gravity.

" To combat this problem, NASA scientists spent a decade
and $12 billion developing a pen that writes in zerogravity,
upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including
glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to
over 300* C.

The Russians used a pencil.

Enjoy paying your taxes this year

use a pencil. I mean Sh!t

RomEo

 

[supergoat]

I'm pretty sure that was true actually.

 

[supergoat]

Originally posted by AlecW81
It's funny in a politically incorrect way.... the best racist jokes I've ever heard were told by some of my black friends... if they can tell them, than all your lily white a$$es can stop acting all offended when someone tells an "off-color" joke. Boo Hoo...

Agreed, if people can't laugh at themselves who can we laugh at?

I seriously have lots of black friends and we have never had any issues arise due to telling "off-color" jokes.

 

[mitsuspeed]

Originally posted by AlecW81
It's funny in a politically incorrect way.... the best racist jokes I've ever heard were told by some of my black friends... if they can tell them, than all your lily white a$$es can stop acting all offended when someone tells an "off-color" joke. Boo Hoo...

agrred. its just a joke. i personaly no NAdsm and hes not racist. you kids need to chill.

 

[na90dsm]

thanx guys. i dont say these jokes to be a racist bastard, i tell them because some of the best jokes are offernding in some way. im sure come colored people have some damn funny jokes about white people.



if we cant laugh at a stupid off-color joke then somethings wrong.



please nobody take offense it was just a joke. if i offended you i appologize.





ok heres a few stupid jokes.




1. 2 guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks

2. 2 guys walk into a bar, to think one of em woulda seen it.

3. a mushroom walks into a bar, everyone goers silent and stares at him. he looks and says" what im a fungi"

4. a horse walks into the bar, the bartender says" why the long face"







anyone else...........

 

[RaysTsi]

Whats the difference between a blond and a mosquito(sp?)?.
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The mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.

 

[entropy138]

Originally posted by supergoat
I'm pretty sure that was true actually.

hmm you ever tried writing w/ a pen upside down?? seems to work to me

Its a good joke either way!!

 

[Davidle]

Okay, here's a little joke for ya.....

A black guy (driver), a white guy, and a chinese guy, all 3 of them were just about to get inside of the DSM after a long night of drinking, to go home....

while driving.......The black guy says, wanna see what my car can do?

The white guy says, "Hell yea, lets see how this beast handles!"

The chinese guy says, "No No, Me No Wanna Die!"

and so the black guy took it full throttle, went around a sharp curve at 90mph, and flipped the car...

The car rolled 6 times, landing upside down..

The black guy pushes his way out of the driver side window, and said...... Oh No! I think I broke my arm!!!!

The white guy crawls out of the passenger side window and said.....
Oh No! I think I broke my leg!!!

The chinese guy was stuck inside of the car crying, screaming and yelling, and said.......

Ching Wong, wing wong, I think I broke my ding dong!!!!!!

 

[entropy138]

LAME. Jokes about crashing DSMs

 

[na90dsm]

this guy walks into the bar with a monkey on his sholder.

he sits at the bar and the monkey sits next to him.

the guy says to the bartender "ill have a shot for me and the monkey"

the bartender says" im not to sure about serving the monkey a shot"
the guy says "its cool hell be fine, we do this all the time"

the bartender says "ok whatever" and gives them there shots

the monkey and the guy pound down the shots then the monkey goes andf starts runnin around like crazy, jumps up on the pool table and eats one of the pool balls.

the bartender is like " what the f$#k was that, he just ate one of my pool balls. you and the monkey have to leave now"

the guy says "ok i dont want any trouble so ill make ends meat and pay for the damages."

the bartender agrees and the guy pays and the 2 leave the bar.

a week later the guy and the monkey return to the bar and sit down at the bar.

the bartender says "yes"

the guy says "a shot for me and them monkey please"

the bartender says "i dont think so the last time he ate one of my balls'

the guy says" hell be fine this time, i beat the hell outta him the last time. just give em a shot and see"

the bartender is like ok whatever, but if anything happens all hell will break loose"

the guy says ok and they do the same, him and the monkey pound the shots, the mokey gets up, runs around like crazy, jumps up on the bar and stick a peanut up his ass, take sit out looks at it and eats it.

the bartender is like "what the hell was that. he just stuck a peanut up his ass and ate it. what the hell"




the guy says "well after the pool ball he had to make sure it fit"



:laugh:

 

[eclipse13]

a black guy and a mexican guy are riding in a car. who is driving?
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the cop!




it was kinda funny

 

[na90dsm]

why do mexicans have such small steering wheels














so they can drive with handcuffs:laugh:

 

[GSXTCY]

Rule #7
No porn or posting of sexually or racially offensive content (or links).

I know these are jokes but it could turn into something else or someone could take offense to this. If you wish to share jokes please use pm or email.