Funny Cop Stories

[tom1995tsi]

Well here is myne:

The college where my friend goes to has a bunch of dorms. Outside my friends dorm there
is a table where everyone hangs out ect. It was friday night and this kid walks up and he was trashed. He started passing out at the table and stuff. Then a cop car pulls up turns off his car and starts walking towards the dorm. He notices that the kid was wreaked and said to him "You breathlizer Right now". The kid just looked at him and said "Just take me". So the cop cuffs the kids hands behind his back and they both start walking towards the car. The kid stops, looks back at the table of people, smiles and then screams "SHOTGUN" and runs towards the cop car. The cop which was a few feet infront of him cloth lines him and knocks the kid out cold. The cop then picks the kid up throws him in the back of the cruiser and drives away.

 

[92_75i]

The kid stops, looks back at the table of people, smiles and then screams "SHOTGUN" and runs towards the cop car.

:laugh: :laugh: i would of laughed my ass of, if I was there

 

[90GSXDan]

First and only time I got pulled over, couple of weeks ago, Cop walks up to the car and says i was doing whatever in this speed zone. Mind you Im being very polite and I really wasnt go as fast as he says I was, so got away with it. But the funniest thing happened and I couldnt laugh. As he went to go put is hand on my roof to lean on it (it was raining), He slipped and fell to the floor. He made the funniest "WOOAAH!" Ive ever heard in my life. He giggled and went back to the cruiser. As he was walking back to the car, he tripped on a pothole that was about 4 inches deep and screams "ah jesus" on the way down! As he gets to the car laughing, He said hes just going to let me off the hook and follows by saying, "I quit, Im going home... hopefully in one piece." Then I just started bursting out into tears as I witnessed the law on its downfall. Literally!

Dan

 

[tom1995tsi]

^^^

 

[Girvin]

this goes way back.....

About 4 years ago when I first got my DSM (in my rice days). I pulled up to a 7/11 store to get some goodies. When I came outside I noticed a cop was parked behind my car with the lights on. I realized that I had left my underbody neon kit on and the cop was writting something down. I introduced myself as the owner of the car and the cop immediately gave me the riot act about how neons were illegal blah blah blah.

The cop then gave me the option of having my car towed or to "disable" the neon system. I obviously wasnt interested in a tow bill. The cop then asked me to pop my hood and pulled out a Leatherman utility knife. He said "tell which wire it is or I'll just start cutting til they go out"....I pointed to the transformer wires before he had the chance to cut anything.

Cop grabbed the main tube wire and ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPP!!!
Good ol' trusty metal knife+ transformer= cop ownage

Got away without a ticket and for some reason the cop was very quiet ...........damn hard to keep a straight face afterwards.

 

[dremersvision]

This is some funny stuff. Lmao.......

 

[BLINKY619]

this goes way back.....

About 4 years ago when I first got my DSM (in my rice days). I pulled up to a 7/11 store to get some goodies. When I came outside I noticed a cop was parked behind my car with the lights on. I realized that I had left my underbody neon kit on and the cop was writting something down. I introduced myself as the owner of the car and the cop immediately gave me the riot act about how neons were illegal blah blah blah.

The cop then gave me the option of having my car towed or to "disable" the neon system. I obviously wasnt interested in a tow bill. The cop then asked me to pop my hood and pulled out a Leatherman utility knife. He said "tell which wire it is or I'll just start cutting til they go out"....I pointed to the transformer wires before he had the chance to cut anything.

Cop grabbed the main tube wire and ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPP!!!
Good ol' trusty metal knife+ transformer= cop ownage

Got away without a ticket and for some reason the cop was very quiet ...........damn hard to keep a straight face afterwards.

hahaha... i bet he felt the voltage...!!!!

 

[AK Maniak]

this goes way back.....

About 4 years ago when I first got my DSM (in my rice days). I pulled up to a 7/11 store to get some goodies. When I came outside I noticed a cop was parked behind my car with the lights on. I realized that I had left my underbody neon kit on and the cop was writting something down. I introduced myself as the owner of the car and the cop immediately gave me the riot act about how neons were illegal blah blah blah.

The cop then gave me the option of having my car towed or to "disable" the neon system. I obviously wasnt interested in a tow bill. The cop then asked me to pop my hood and pulled out a Leatherman utility knife. He said "tell which wire it is or I'll just start cutting til they go out"....I pointed to the transformer wires before he had the chance to cut anything.

Cop grabbed the main tube wire and ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPP!!!
Good ol' trusty metal knife+ transformer= cop ownage

Got away without a ticket and for some reason the cop was very quiet ...........damn hard to keep a straight face afterwards.

hahaha that is so awesome! I would have pissed my self if I saw that

 

[Zdrummer15]

this goes way back.....

About 4 years ago when I first got my DSM (in my rice days). I pulled up to a 7/11 store to get some goodies. When I came outside I noticed a cop was parked behind my car with the lights on. I realized that I had left my underbody neon kit on and the cop was writting something down. I introduced myself as the owner of the car and the cop immediately gave me the riot act about how neons were illegal blah blah blah.

The cop then gave me the option of having my car towed or to "disable" the neon system. I obviously wasnt interested in a tow bill. The cop then asked me to pop my hood and pulled out a Leatherman utility knife. He said "tell which wire it is or I'll just start cutting til they go out"....I pointed to the transformer wires before he had the chance to cut anything.

Cop grabbed the main tube wire and ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPP!!!
Good ol' trusty metal knife+ transformer= cop ownage

Got away without a ticket and for some reason the cop was very quiet ...........damn hard to keep a straight face afterwards.

Were you in a parking lot? If you were, how was it illegal to have them on?

Edit: Nevermind, I see this thread got revived from 04.

 

[the dark one]

i was out driving with my girl late at night, (1:30 AMish)..

i was naturally driving a little under the speed limit so i DONT get pulled over, since i drive a very loud mustang with quite large rear tires.. (hmmm....)

the cop pulls me over, trys to search the vehcile and all this shit, when i finally ask him what i did wrong, he said this and i quote..

"you were driving 34 in a 35, that is probable cause for the searching of your vehicle for drugs and alcohol."

my girl just laughed.. so did i.. he finally goes, "you know what.. i dont have time for this."

he drives off, doesnt stop at a stop sign, and almost drives into the ditch before swerving into an oncoming lane.

????

 

[PIMking]

Were you in a parking lot? If you were, how was it illegal to have them on?

Edit: Nevermind, I see this thread got revived from 04.

holy thread revival!!!

Anywho, When I got the 91 all done I was driving around the town (in Iowa at the time) and a cop picked me up. Walks up and does the normal license and reg crap and tells me to shut the car off... Well I hand him the keys and with the turbo timer it was still running . He gives me a weird look and tells me again. So I just hit the button and killed it.

Well he goes to the cruiser and comes back and tells me that he was surprised that it was a 91' and looks really good. Then he says I pulled you over for a front plate but since you have the Giant radiator up there a front plate would kill air flow. Also is this street legal?

I just laugh and tell him if he wants to get his pretty blue uniform dirty he can tell me if it is or isn't. He laughs and tells me to get out of here.

 

[Zdrummer15]

holy thread revival!!!

Anywho, When I got the 91 all done I was driving around the town (in Iowa at the time) and a cop picked me up. Walks up and does the normal license and reg crap and tells me to shut the car off... Well I hand him the keys and with the turbo timer it was still running . He gives me a weird look and tells me again. So I just hit the button and killed it.

Well he goes to the cruiser and comes back and tells me that he was surprised that it was a 91' and looks really good. Then he says I pulled you over for a front plate but since you have the Giant radiator up there a front plate would kill air flow. Also is this street legal?

I just laugh and tell him if he wants to get his pretty blue uniform dirty he can tell me if it is or isn't. He laughs and tells me to get out of here.

I didn't revive it, but yeah no kidding. Anyway I think you posted this story in another thread I read awhile back, but it still makes me laugh. I just wish I could find cops that easygoing. If you could've seen the cop the first time I ever got pulled over, you would've thought he just saw me shoot someone.

 

[VETTE_50_TH]

No funny cop stories but as always....FTP

 

[KadieTSi]

I was with my brother's best friend in my car. He personally has a turbo 240sx.

He had wanted a ride in my car since he heard what I made on the dyno.
So I took him with me on small trip to my grandmothers to pick up a couple things, about a 30 minute drive.

I didn't want to risk breaking anything on the way up so towards the end of the trip on the highway, I dropped it to third gear and did a pull through third and fourth.. After hearing a bunch of "holy craps / no way's" from my passenger I had slowed and moved to take my exit and then a cop came flying up on me and pulled me over after I got off the highway.

He first came up all mad then he saw me and my brother's friend and asked whose car it was. I told him it was mine. He asked how much stuff it had done to it. I just told him it was turbo'd with a lot done. And he asked if I have had it to the drag strip yet. Told him what my best run was and what my best dyno was. He said how shocked he was at how much power people are getting out of these 4cylinders these days.

He said he was going to let me off with a verbal warning and said how if I did that kind of stuff I need to keep it to a track or else one of the abandoned highway (we have a lot of old abandoned highways in Nevada that dont have more than 2-3 cars on them a week) he said he clocked me at 132mph and said how lucky I was that he was in a good mood. Then my brother's friend finally said loud enough for him to hear "and lucky she has boobs" and I got mad and hit him in the shoulder. The cop didn't say anything but laughed and walked back to his car.

Was the only time I've ever been pulled over or anything

 

[brownfinger]

I was with my brother's best friend in my car.

He had wanted a ride in my car since he heard what I made on the dyno.

He asked whose car it was. I told him it was mine. He asked how much stuff it had done to it. Told him what my best run was and what my best dyno was.

Then my brother's friend finally said loud enough for him to hear "and lucky she has boobs" and I got mad and hit him in the shoulder.

You're a quick learner!

 

[1Gab Laser]

A couple years ago this kid here had a Saturn SL1 that was beat to hell. He came downtown where we were and had a pair of brass knuckles in his console. He goes "I'll give $100 to whoever can put a dent in my car." Now remember the bodies of Saturns are fiberglass so that wont work.

So we're all in this parking lot swinging punches at his car. Someone walking down the street called the cops. This cop on a bicycle rolls up to us, the kid with the brass knuckles throws them on the passengers floor thinking the cop didn't see them.

So the cop comes down and just starts shooting the bull with us. Hung around for about a half hour probably. Then he starts to pedal away, stops, looks back and says "By the way, brass knuckles are illegal in NH"





Then probably a month ago I was in Concord, saw one of my friends at a gas station. Pulled in to talk to him and there's literally an import (I wont use the "word") at every fuel pump and a group of like 15 kids. We hung around there for probably an hour, everyone kept coming over to look at my GTP and telling me to pop the hood (its stock ). Telling me they want to race me. Then a cop pulls up to the gas station and goes "Well this looks like an illegal street race waiting to happen." This kid says "What do you think we are, stupid?" Cop nods. Kid goes "Actually yeah, we are stupid, but we're not RETARDED. You realize its pouring rain right?" The cop was real cool and just talked and joked around with us for like an hour. PS no street racing took place, at least not while I was there.

 

[98GSXin]

A little while ago I was cruising with my buddy in his truck to get some food. On the way there a cop starts to follow us for some reason. (maybe because it was 2 am and we were two college age kids on a munchie run) Anyways, my friend puts his blinker on and slowly tries to get over a lane for the next exit and the cop flys up into that lane next to us and mean mugs us like crazy. He goes, "THIS IS MY LANE!" in a hulk like intimidating tone to try and scare us or something. We were caught so off guard that we had no idea what to do. We just took one look at each other, rolled up the windows and kept rolling right past our exit. It didn't seem so important to get the munchies any longer. He left us alone after another mile or so of cruising next to us and staring us down.

Looking back on it we realized how ridiculous that really was. After the fear for our freedom subsided, it was ten times funnier in hindsight.

 

[habitatguy187]

Anyways, my friend puts his blinker on and slowly tries to get over a lane for the next exit and the cop flys up into that lane next to us and mean mugs us like crazy. He goes, "THIS IS MY LANE!" in a hulk like intimidating tone to try and scare us or something.

I would totally do something like this if I were a cop.

 

[CrackedDSM]

A little while ago I was cruising with my buddy in his truck to get some food. On the way there a cop starts to follow us for some reason. (maybe because it was 2 am and we were two college age kids on a munchie run) Anyways, my friend puts his blinker on and slowly tries to get over a lane for the next exit and the cop flys up into that lane next to us and mean mugs us like crazy. He goes, "THIS IS MY LANE!" in a hulk like intimidating tone to try and scare us or something. We were caught so off guard that we had no idea what to do. We just took one look at each other, rolled up the windows and kept rolling right past our exit. It didn't seem so important to get the munchies any longer. He left us alone after another mile or so of cruising next to us and staring us down.

Looking back on it we realized how ridiculous that really was. After the fear for our freedom subsided, it was ten times funnier in hindsight.

At that point, I wouldn't care. I would have dropped a gear, pushed the cops sh-- in, and just dealt with the ticket. It would've been too good of an opportunity to pass up.





I don't really have any funny stories per say, only one that's halfway decent.


Back when I lived in CO, I was out cruising on Sante Fe heading out to my cousins house in Littleton(I was coming from Englewood) in my 1G AWD. I had just gotten it at this time, and I was young, stupid, and untouchable. I'd just swapped the 14B w/ m/t manifold, 450cc injectors, M/T cams, M/T FPR, and M/T ECU in it and bought a cheap hallman MBC. So I thought the car was the fastest ever. Well, I pull up to a stoplight, and a blacked out charger pulls up. Either he revved, or he accidentally blipped the throttle, either way I started to brake boost. Light turned green, AWD launched, pulled a car or so from the launch, and he started to catch back up when I passed 10 mph above the speed limit, and that's when he hit his lights. Pulled over, shut the car off and instantly got pissed off thinking I was getting a big ticket for street racing.

Cop walks up to my window, and it's my uncle. Me and him chat for awhile, afterwords he's like "Yeah, don't tell your cousin about this or I'll have to take you to jail. I did not think a four cylinder could even keep up with my charger. I should give you a ticket, dammit."

Was a nice surprise. After that though I started getting into the DSM forums real big, and saw just how frowned upon street racing was, and didn't do it again. From there on out I took it to Bandimere.

 

[lk82]

Well it funny now but last night it made my heart drop and laugh at the same time.
Well last night i was driving down the highway going to a friends house to work on the car.
So anyways Im doing about 71 on a 65 when i pull up to this RICED out galant, Im just looking at it kind laughing to myself then I look in the rearview and this car is riding my A$$ and flashing his brights at me... So i speed up just a hair to like 75 and the guy is still there, so in my head im like ok so this guys want to try and ride my ass ill give him somthing to catch. Well the moment i had put my hand on the shifter to down shift I see the gggggoooooooooodddddd ol red and blues! So im like sh!t im going to get a ticket this sucks well i speed up just a hair to get in front of the galant and as soon as I change lanes the cop just flys by me and over the loud speaker I hear "THANK YOU" and he just takes off, But holy crap if my heart wasnt in my stomach

 

[noV8undrDIShood]

i have a story from about a year and a half ago.. not really that funny but showed the ignorance of the cop.. i was on my way to play some poker at a buddies place when the kid riding with me starts ragging on me about my car. Typical V8 guy, well needless to say i dropped it down to 3 and did a full pull that shit him up relly quick. Well what do a know here comesa set of lights flying up behind me.. so i pull over. Cop walks up and after checking lisence /registration and everything he asked were i was in such a hurry to be. I told him i was going to play some cards with some buddies.. shockingly he makes the comment "well are you feeling lucky?" and i grabbed my lucky coin (two headed quarter) and said yeah i was hoping to win some tonight.. he told me to give him the quarter and said if you call two flips on a row i will let you go if not you get a ticket. So i odviosly took it, first flip(called heads) and won; second flip (called heads) and won.. he handed me the coin and told me to slow down.. what a dumb@$$

thank god for double headed coins