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Dumbest things you've heard a DSMer say? :)

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Tobuk

15+ Year Contributor
116
0
Apr 29, 2006
Federal Way, Washington
I go to DeVry University here in the Seattle area where I'm at, and I drive a white 1995 GST. I just started here in the summer, and about the 2nd week into the semester, i saw a white 97-99 eclipse, so i thought "hey awesome, another eclipse in the area." I thought that was cool because i just got my GST a few months ago and don't know any local people who own a DSM.

I ran into him a few times and found his car is a GSX that is bone stock save for his suspension setup. Just last week I had a mechanic friend of mine looking at my car after classes (he has a really nice old Porche 944) and we had the hood up, just lookin'. So that other kid with the GSX pulled up next to my car in the parking lot and got out to look too.

The first thing that came out of his mouth when he looked at my engine bay was, "Why do you have your blow off valve recirculated?"

It was an honest question, and I decided to be nice and answer his question simply, and save him the 5 minute lecture of why he's an idiot. He was genuinely surprised that I didn't want to have the louder BOV sound, and didn't care when I explained to him that he is likely running rich, etc. etc. etc.

He than also asked me if it's normal for an Eclipse to blow smoke out the exhaust. After i got over this 2nd little surprising question, i said no, it's not normal. Turns out he blows a lot of white smoke, and he still has his stock turbo with 130k miles on the clock. So i told him that is turbo is likely burning some oil (smelled that way too)

So, that gave me the idea to ask, What dumb things have you heard DSMers say? Also, what dumb things have your heard other car enthusiasts say about DSMs?
 
Last summer a kid in a 2g n/a parked next to me at the mall. He asked if I wanted to be in a car club, I said no. So he went on to ask me what my mods were and how fast my car was. I didn't say much, didn't want to talk to him. Then he goes on to tell me he is the fastest guy in his club and pretty soon he is getting a turbo kit for his car and will be running 30 lbs of boost, no engine mods other than the turbo. He finished the conversation with. I'll race you when I get it back from the shop. Ummm. ok.
 
A guy in a gas station I go to said that he bought an AWD Talon that is in a shop getting engine work, cams etc, done to it and then he asked me, "you have 12 valves in your engine, right?!" :D That's with the decal on the side of my car that clearly states "16 Valve DOHC Turbo".

Another guy asked me whats the purpose of the big "can" on my car (he was talking about my cat back). :rolleyes:
 
Dumbest thing I've ever heard a dsmer say? I don't consider them real dsmers if they're idiots. But theres a kid who owns a 1ga Talon TSI AWD who goes to the college I go too. I went up to him and asked about his car "what mods he had done" he said none but he wants to get a blitz kit and some z3 fenders and a COLD AIR INTAKE. I had to take a few minutes to explain to him that if he is using the stock intercooler (which of course he is, no mods other then a fart can muffler) that he can't really put a cold air intake on the car, and even then it isn't something he can just go out and purchase. Made me so mad I wanted to take the car from the kid to save it from its ricer lifestyle.
 
I hear and see plenty of stupid things all day long.
 
Kid with a GVR4: "Is that thing turbo?" (while starring at my front mount)

2G N/T driver: "Is that a turbo?" (again, while looking right at the front mount)

1G N/T driver: "That's one of the turbo ones right?" (you guessed it, ditto)

1G TSi driver: "You should get 1000cc's, that way you'll never run out of fuel." (oh should I?)

1G N/T driver w/minor bolt ons: "I could take you on the higway." (oh could you?)

And my all time favorite...

every reply to this topic: http://www.dsmtuners.com/forums/showthread.php?t=241565
ROFL ROFL

j/p, it was right there, I had to.
 
Not a DSMer but I was going out bowling and drinking with my roomates a couple weeks ago and our newest roommate who had never been in my car asked "is this the gsx, twin turbo?" WTF

I let it go b/c well I live with him so why argue.

Then on the way home he heard my BOV and said "hey do you have a BOV?"
To which I said yes
The other two roommates asked what it was b/c their not into cars and new roommate replies with "They don't really do anything, they just sound cool" :toobad:

I also didn't reply to this b/c I didn't feel like explaining it to them especially since clearly they would have had no idea what I was saying :beatentodeath: :toobad:
 
AN automatic?? Haha automatics are slow. Later on I seriously doubt he felt the same way. ;)
 
SBstar said:
Wow I read just the first and last pages of that thread and my head hurts. :barf:

Someone once said that an AEM fuel rail with -6 lines was an "upgrade" over the stock rail and that the stock rail could cause your engine to run dangerously lean.

Too bad he never bothered to actually measure the stock rail and -6 line diameters.

It turns out the stock rail is far larger than the -6 lines he used to plumb is upgraded fuel rail with.

Hal
 
"does your car have blowing off valves?"
"Isn't the GSX the V6 one?"
"I thought my GSX is V-6?"

The best ones were when i was selling my car....
"I see you posted greddy TT, just wondering what 'Twin Turbo' set up are you using?" ---my responce "YEA ITS FAST AS HELL!!! BUY IT BRO, YOU'LL HAVE THE ONLY TWIN TURBO ECLIPSE EVER!" people are retards
 
One of my "friends" just recently started telling everyone in my school that he has 350whp on his 97 GST w/ 165k on the odometer when he knows that I know exactly what he has. He says to a couple of my friends, but not me of course, that he went to the track and we raced...."I ran 13.4 and Brian (me) only ran 15.2"...which I did run 15.2 (sue me im still learning...mods in profile LOL)...thing is....he didnt even run that night...and never has/ will run HIS car. The car bucks and sputters and shoots every colored smoke out of its exhaust and people are hypnotized because he has a vta'd SSQV. Maybe people who know a thing or two should look and see that his "GT30R" is being supported by a stock smic too.....idiots.
 
I asked a customer that had recently installed a 255: Do you have an AFPR?

His answer was: What's that?

His friend quickly replied: Aftermarket Fuel Pressure Riser

I had to walk away for a bit before actually telling him what it was...I was dying laughing. Not because he was wrong but because he was so adamant that that's what is was...it actually took me about 10 minutes to convince him even AFTER I showed him proof.
 
EclipseTrbo420A said:
Wow, I know exactly how the OP of that thread felt. I was exactly like him when I first got my car. I was completely clueless. Anyway here's some things I've heard, not by DSM'ers, but by other "car enthusiasts":

1. 1 psi = 10 hp regardless of turbo and the setup (this guy supposebly overhauled an engine before :rolleyes: )

2. Taking the cat off and putting a test pipe adds like 30 hp. Ok :rolleyes:

3. I felt a huge difference when I put that k&n filter in. :rolleyes:

4. Aren't the talons a bootleg version of the eclipse? :rolleyes:

5. Do an awd burnout! (on a 195 hp car)

6. Him: Do you have a bov?
Me: yes
Him: howcome i can't hear it?
Me: because it's stock
Him: bov's don't come stock
Me: :rolleyes:

7. My friend's friend's friend's friend has a stage 3 turbo on his talon. :rolleyes:

8. A v6 mustang owner called my car slow and rice. :rolleyes:

9. According to a Civic ex owner: "My car feels more torquey than yours." This was comparing both cars' throttle at 2k rpms.
 
One time I was at a car show and there was a kid who had a 96 gsx with minor bolt ons nothin serious and i talked to him for a minute and hes like " You might have noticed that I have one Z rated tire and one W rated tire thats because the left tire spins faster then the right tire does"

After that I was lost for words and walked away
 
PSI NRG said:
One time I was at a car show and there was a kid who had a 96 gsx with minor bolt ons nothin serious and i talked to him for a minute and hes like " You might have noticed that I have one Z rated tire and one W rated tire thats because the left tire spins faster then the right tire does"

After that I was lost for words and walked away
Wouldn't that be true though if he had a busted differential? I'm just wondering, i'm probably wrong.
 
If the diff was broken the car wouldnt drive right period. Either way thats not a valid excuse to run 2 different rated tires I could see running a different rated tire because you werent paying attention when buying it or they ran out of stock and you needed it because it needs to be fixed ASAP. And to try and BS me on how one tire spins faster then the other just blew my mind. If you are accelerating in a straight line all tires will be spinning the same speed UNLESS you are RWD and loose traction and in that case the rear tires would spin faster then the fronts. OR when turning a corner the inside tire will spin faster because it has less distance to travel then the outside tire. This is were a differental comes in to play which allows for the inside wheel to rotate faster then the outside. If you ever watch a RWD car with a spool or a dsm with a welded diff corner you will noticed the outside tire hops because there's no differental so the outside wheel tries to keep up with the inside wheel causing the hop.
 
PSI NRG said:
If the diff was broken the car wouldnt drive right period. Either way thats not a valid excuse to run 2 different rated tires I could see running a different rated tire because you werent paying attention when buying it or they ran out of stock and you needed it because it needs to be fixed ASAP. And to try and BS me on how one tire spins faster then the other just blew my mind. If you are accelerating in a straight line all tires will be spinning the same speed UNLESS you are RWD and loose traction and in that case the rear tires would spin faster then the fronts. OR when turning a corner the inside tire will spin faster because it has less distance to travel then the outside tire. This is were a differental comes in to play which allows for the inside wheel to rotate faster then the outside. If you ever watch a RWD car with a spool or a dsm with a welded diff corner you will noticed the outside tire hops because there's no differental so the outside wheel tries to keep up with the inside wheel causing the hop.
Aah gotcha.
 
I was once at a local DSM meet, and a FWD DSMer came up to me.

dsmer: "GSX, huh?"
me: "Yep.."
dsmer: "Why didn't you get a Talon instead? You know the AWD talon has a 60/40 power distribution while the GSX is only 70/30, right?"
me: "WTF " :tease:
 
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