DSMTuner Mom goes home.

[GSntncT]

Doug, I am truly sorry to hear about your loss. I hope that everyone who has come to this thread, really take what you said to heart, as my mother died two months ago today. We never had too much of a mother-son relationship. After I got to a certain age, I never even tried to re-establish anything. Now I will spend the rest of my life regretting that I never tried. Maybe we all in one way or another take things for granted. To those of you who have that great relationship-please keep it strong. To those of you who don't-give her a call......do SOMETHING. Doug, I tip my hat off to you for being able to tell your friends, and moreso complete strangers, about your loss. God bless.

Phoenix

 

[WSU99GSX]

My condolences to you and your family. I don't pray often, but I will for you and your family.

 

[titogs95]

I am really sorry!!!!
It really touch me. And I am going to start enjoying every minute that i can with my parents while I have them!
My condolences!!!!!!
The DSMTUNER is here to support you!

Tito

 

[Ludachris]

Great post Doug. I hope you were able to spend all the time you could with your mother before she passed. I appreciate you sharing your emotions with us at a time like this. Hang on to those memories and keep livin life man. God rest her soul.

 

[Mr.Tao]

Thank You for sharing with Doug. I've been through the same circumstances as well. After all these years, you sometimes regret, and sometimes angry. But most of all, i just try make her proud as if she were still here and thank God for giving me such a person to ever love in a lifetime.

 

[bwhite]

Sounds like your mom was cool.
My condolences on the loss of your mom.
Grace and peace to you and your family.

 

[awd4g63]

Good post, man. Sorry to hear about your mother, but it seems like there was a lot of love there to last forever. I'm sure she doesn't want you to be sad, so hang in there, our condolences and prayers are with you.

 

[dustintoy]

my condolences...

 

[Defiant]

Sypathies and condolences, Doug. Lost my dad last year, my ex's mom is going now.

For all the time it takes up, you'd think life would last longer.


I hope you're well.

 

[EclpzLvr97]

Doug, I'm late on finding this thread; I apologize or I would have never PMed you at a time like this for car advice. Although I've never met your mother, as you obviously know, I met you once before, and you're a great guy.....great mothers bring up great sons.

She is better now. Even when you feel alone, don't believe it....you're never alone. Take care.

 

[97GS-TSpyder]

taht sucks man....if theres anything i can do let me know....

 

[Doug99RS]

I appreciate everyone's thoughts, prayers and best wishes. There's no need to apologize for asking me for help. This post and the PM went up all at the same time so you had no way of knowing.

I will be coming up here each weekend (Newport News area) for the next couple of weeks/months. There's a meet in Sept. in Va Beach so feel free to stop by then and we can meet/catch up.

Hope everyone the best and I will talk with you soon.
Doug

P.S. I wanted to add a bit more here about mom, her three year battle, and what I know of cancer in general.

Mom had cancer that showed itself in the form of a stomach pain. As tests later showed in the following months, the doctors found it to be cancer somewhere in that area. They were unable to determine exactly where the cancer was but they knew there were some "abnormalities" in the liver. Months went by and they threw one chemotherapy after another at her. They used a heavy regiment on her time and time again with few side-affects.
As many of you Chemotherapy makes many people sick and can cause hair loss. I'd like to share a few more tid-bits here to put a different and more positive spin on her life with cancer. First off.... the cancer didn't get her and it isn't a death sentence. Mom didn't lose her hair until the last couple of weeks and she didn't have years of sickness as she underwent treatment.
I never knew what chemo was and thought it involved putting the patient in to some large machine that basically microwaves her body. But that's not the case. Mom was given the chemo intro-veinusly (sp?). Basically it was a bag hanging from a machine that pumped it in to her veins like we see on tv all the time. It took two the three hours to do and she was back home. Mom ran a slight fever each night and was fine the rest of the week in most cases. Every now and again there was times when she was sick from it. Vomiting and the like. But bottom line is that there was life with chemo and she lived it.
Chemo is alot like antibiotics. If you keep taking the same one over and over again then it's effectiveness goes down. So they had to change it up. It wasn't until this last group that she finally lost her hair. Hair loss is frequently seen as "things getting bad". That's not the case and it upset my mom alot when people said that. Chemo attacks the fastest growing cells. Cancer and hair are two of them. Mom's not supposed to lose her hair. That's what I kept saying to myself. But if she could handle it.... I guess I had to as well.
Mom was in good spirits all the way to the end. She did her blood work last Monday, it showed to be on the low side of normal but Mom had been able to handle that before. The chemo went in Tuesday and for the next two days she was on top of the world. They have new drugs (expensive though) that reduced even the minor side affects she had dealt with a few times. The Cancer didn't take my Mom. An infection did. What most people don't know is that when the chemo goes in, it wipes out the white blood cells which are responsible for fighting infection. Mom either had an infection that had just started or the chemo brought it about. But with the chemo in, the white blood cell count all but gone, the infection was able to run throughout her entire body. Organ after organ began to shut down as the infection grabbed hold. She was gone in a few days.
The details beyond that are not really important and hopefully we won't ever be in a position where we can compare notes. But the most important thing I want everyone to know is that Cancer doesn't mean you will lose your loved one. There is life during cancer and as I hope others can share... life after it as well.
Doug

 

[eclpsegsx12]

Thanks Doug for posting this. It helped me realize how important my parents are even if I think they are just in my way (me being a teenager and all). My parents have helped me so much and help support me and my car, and when i look back at it, what they do is amazing. Im very sorry to hear the loss of your mother, and i just want to thank you again for helping me realize. You and your family are in my prayers.

 

[97GS-TSpyder]

I love you man!!!!!!

 

[LandoAWD]

But the most important thing I want everyone to know is that Cancer doesn't mean you will lose your loved one. There is life during cancer and as I hope others can share... life after it as well.
Doug

You are on target as usual.

My mom survived a bout with breast cancer a few years back after undergoing rigorous chemotherapy and facing the same hair loss. Though things appeared grim for a while, she kept her faith, lived life the only way she knew how, and had the support of friends and loved ones...not much more one can do in that situation. She wishes the best for your family as well.


You know how I feel about all this, Doug, and you know I'm here for ya.

 

[Davidle]

Doug,

I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. I will pray for you and your family as well.

Keep your head up bro, because your mom is always going to watch over you and will forever and always, be in your heart.







David

 

[leet]

You are on target as usual.

My mom survived a bout with breast cancer a few years back after undergoing rigorous chemotherapy and facing the same hair loss. Though things appeared grim for a while, she kept her faith, lived life the only way she knew how, and had the support of friends and loved ones...not much more one can do in that situation. She wishes the best for your family as well.


You know how I feel about all this, Doug, and you know I'm here for ya.

Treating a person who has an ailment such as cancer/leukemia as you would any other person can actually do a lot to up their morale. It lets them know that they do have a chance.

Very well said

 

[TSiBER RYDER]

i am incredibly sorry to hear what happened, man. my prayers go out to you, and seriously, thanks for sharing what happened with us. i've been on my own since i was 16 yrs old, and every year it seems that i talk to and see my mom less. i know she loves me and all, but i'm taking her love for granted like she'll always be there. but your post helped me realize how special my mother is and how much hell she must have gone through raising a little brat like myself especially after me leaving my family at 16. i wish i hadn't gone. guess it's time to give her a call.... thanks.

 

[97ClipseDSM]

When you go home tonight hug your mom, call her, email her or whisper her name in your prayers. Enjoy every minute you can because in an instant she may not be there.

After 3 years of cancer treatment at 5:45pm my mom passed away in Norfolk Naval Medical hospital here in Virginia. Some of you had the opportunity to meet her at the Va. Beach meet we had a few months ago. I can honestly say that I am very glad to have brought Mom and Dad to that meet. Though she had never been a big fan of my driving habits she was always supportive of the things that made me happy.

For years she kept mentioning marriage, grandkids, and things of that nature. In the last year or so she finally backed off and started to change her tone. Cars.... many, many cars she said would be what she had in place of grandkids. It's funny actually. I look out in to their driveway and see a fleet of cars yet no pitty-pat of feet in the house. That's what I gave them because that's who I am.

The next mod you do to your car, I can only hope that you make it something to help you get home safely to visit your family. Don't hesitate to be with your family as much as you can. Listen to the stories, about their love for each other, and all the things that you did as a child even though you don't remember them. Bring you family to the meets and make your friends a part of the family. Share your family with as many people as you can. For when it's time to say good-bye, surround yourself with your friends and family. Stay up talking about "The good ole days." and know that your loved one... loved you.
Doug

Damn man that hit hard even though ive never met you and your mom. So sorry to hear about that. Thats why i just gave my mom a hug right now before she headed out to work. Prayers to you and your family, and yes shes certainly in a much better place.

 

[ECLIPSE4x4]

Doug, I said what I felt on the Carolina board. I wanted to call and talk to you for a few but figured it would not be a good time. Kind of a time where no matter what you say will make things better or less mournful (if that is a word).

Either way bro, I am here for you and your mother is in a better place now but without the hurt and pain of the cancer.

Let me know if you need ANYTHING.

 

[GSntncT]

I'm truly sorry to hijack this thread, even if it is short. I think it's really cool, and for lack of better words, family-like, that everyone is paying their respects. It's really good to see people get together for something other than cars. Doug, I have also said what I had to say earlier. I continue to pray for you and your loved ones. Continue to keep your head up bro!

Phoenix

 

[dangan]

My mom had a life altering stroke about 4 years ago. She isnt nearly the same as she was before it happened but I thank whatever is out there all the time for her still being with us. My most sincere condolences. I wish you and your family the best over these hard times. Hang in there.


Mat

 

[xBOOSTx]

I am sorry to hear of you and your family's loss. Unfortunatly the loss of a loved one is out of our hands. I believe we all go when it is our time to be with God. Be strong and I wish you the best. My Grandfather, who has been my father since day one, is also running short on his days here with us. It's hard to imagine how life would be without him or any loved one.

 

[Chuck_3]

I'm sorry to hear that, my prayers go out to you and your family...she isn't suffering anymore and is in a better place. I just went home for a short break from school two weeks ago and my best friends mom passed away while i was home from struggling with cancer for 2 years ...it was very tough and it was the right timing for when i went home becuase he really needed his friends to be there with him it was so tough to see him go through that and it hurt me too becuase we are all close, our two families

 

[awd4g63]

I semi know how you feel, Doug. I lost a very good friend of mine several years ago to lukemia, and that was a very, very hard loss for me. Being his Paul Bearer was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I got through it OK, he's in a much better and safer place now, and my life has went on since then. I'm happy he's not in pain anymore, and I'm 100% positive he's happy, too.

Take care